Beautiful Disaster
by SetoAngel01
Summary: After midnight, Johnny shows up to the Moon Theater bloodied, battered and bruised. There he is shocked to see Ash, who has problems of her own. Perhaps together, they can come up with a solution…
1. Conceal

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 1**

 **Concealed**

 **Rated: T**

 _Story Summary: After midnight, Johnny shows up to the Moon Theater bloodied, battered and bruised. There he is shocked to see Ash, who has problems of her own. Perhaps together, they can come up with a solution…_

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 **This plot has been in my head for awhile and I suddenly just had to write it out. It's going to be fairly short (depending on how it goes down) perhaps 3-5 chapters. I hope you enjoy this random plot bunny because I had way too much fun writing it. ;-p**

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It was already well after midnight on this ordinary Thursday night - or Friday morning technically.

The sky unbearably dark; thick clouds blocking any light that would be provided with the barest hints of a crescent moon and the glimpse of ethereal stars. Yet, it was just inky blackness. The bright lights of the city providing any light visible outside; and it was a rather quiet night aside from a few road raging cars, chattering and arguments from nearby bars, and the humming of lights above her.

High in the theater, Ash sat alone in one of the main areas near the practice rooms; pacing around and singing a few scattered lyrics from new song she was the midst of writing - or rather struggling to write. At first, she'd left her normal practice to go to the bathroom, stretch her legs and relieve her sore ass after sitting on the hard wooden floor for the last seven hours. Yet another hour had passed and she hadn't returned to the room since; preferring the more echoing acoustics the hallways offered (and the change of scenery) as she paced near the staircase.

Since the theater group as well as Buster and Miss Crawly retreated to their homes hours ago, Moon Theater had been almost eerily quiet yet it didn't daunt Ash in the least for this was not the first time she'd stayed this late. Nocturnal instincts withholding her from sleep and the lyrics and music flitting about her mind was keeping her going well into the night.

Yet if Ash was at all honest with herself, the reason she was refusing to leave is that she _really_ dreaded going back to her apartment.

Since the rebuilding of Moon Theater was finished and her seemingly on the fast track to an incredible music career, Lance had been showing up all damn hours of the day and night and driving her up the fucking wall. No, she never answered the door (she wasn't that stupid), but he was always knocking and asking for her to talk to him, apologizing profusely through the wood and pathetically begging for a second chance to prove just how sorry he truly was.

 _The fucking liar._

Ash didn't want to hear his excuses - once a cheater, **always** a cheater.

Animals who cheat on their girlfriend of five years with some cheap slut from high school did not deserve redemption. It was all because she finally did something against his wishes - continuing the competition for **them**. Her reasons were not selfish whatsoever but yet to Lance, it was the highest form of betrayal and gave him enough of an excuse to trade her in.

The very recollection of catching him about to kiss Becky (in their shared apartment nonetheless) caused her gut to clench uncomfortably. Ash poured years of her life into him and he tosses her away like a used tissue. So, no, he didn't deserve to be heard out; didn't deserve another chance to just rip her beating heart out of her chest.

She may have fallen for it once, but she would **never** make that mistake again…

Hearing him knocking at her door in the middle of the night a few times a week for months on end, Ash finally broke. Bellowed out a flat out - " **NO!** " - when he yet again begged her for another chance.

Yet Lance wouldn't be deterred.

Ash regretted even answering his muffled requests because, if anything, it just made him **more** determined…and it all went fucking downhill from there.

For the past week, Ash was kept wide awake every night; Lance knocking, talking to her through the door and _begging_ for her to at least hear him out but Ash refused. For two days now, she hadn't sleep a wink and damn, it was showing. She was moody, tense, and falling asleep in the practice room (which Buster did not appreciate whatsoever). Figuring out quickly that the excess caffeine and jitteriness it caused was not great for her health. She couldn't keep functioning properly like this so Ash thought staying late at the Moon Theater instead of returning to her apartment was a good idea.

It being the first night she attempted something of the sort and so far so good…

…well, at first…

" _Dammit!_ " Ash muttered, scratching out some freshly written lyrics with gusto.

"That doesn't even make sense! **Ugh**!" she grumbled, plopping herself down onto the stairs and reworking the lyrics over and over in her head as she nervously clicked the pen over and over again. A sudden desire to fling it into the wall was ridiculously tempting... Yet she held it back with a sigh, reasoning that her severe lack of sleep making her mind crazy and nothing she did was coming out right because of it.

It was beyond frustrating yet still, she didn't feel like sleeping.

Instead, she remained lost in her head, humming out the tune she already worked out when she was suddenly and unpleasantly greeted by a slamming down the hallway. A powerful punch of wood that had all of her quills and fur standing up on end. Fear she never experienced was showcased; plastered all over her face and echoing throughout every nerve of her body as she stared at the direction it came.

A part of her wanted to bail because seriously, fuck that. She would happily deal with Lance's knocking and pathetic ramblings than whatever the hell this was…

Ash wasn't stupid - even with a head and back full of spines, she was really no match for some monstrous animal coming in to rob the joint (even if Buster never kept more than $200 bucks in the theater at any one time). Yet as the tense seconds passed without another sound, her more logical side reasoned that perhaps something fell over - it wouldn't be the first time and she doubted it would be the last. Even after the renovations, there was still creaking from the shifting building and things falling from time to time. It could even be the poltergeist of some long deceased theater performer angry about the building being knocked down and rebuilt over their remains or something…

Hell if she knew but Ash wasn't crazy about the idea of finding out.

Mind made up, Ash made a grab for the sheets of music she dropped and her guitar leaning on a wall nearby, Ash was full on ready to bail and head back to her apartment (even though she really didn't want to) when a sudden muffled voice came form the same general direction.

"Oh **bollocks**!" she heard what was a very obvious (and heavily muffled) British accent; a voice she knew _far_ too well.

 _Johnny…_

Ash's tense shoulders fell; Johnny was slightly less threatening than a fly with one wing so she was relieved it wasn't a murderer but it still made her feel slightly antsy.

A sudden sense of anger that the gorilla would come here so late and interrupt her time to practice alone and away from her ex-boyfriend infested apartment. When he left earlier that night, she texted him back and forth and the gorilla gave no hint as to he intended to return to the theater. Now, that he was definitely here, she really didn't want Johnny to know how pitiful she was hiding out here (and secretly hoping to sleep here to get some kind of respite tonight).

Johnny was a very close friend and she hadn't even told him about her problems - although he did notice she hadn't slept and his comments about how 'feisty' she'd been lately were ignored. Ash made up some excuse about insomnia from her songwriting because she intended to keep Lance's midnight visits a secret. Never wanting him to find out because she really didn't want him to worry. Ash would rather deal with it herself than worry Johnny about something that was strictly her own problem…

The guy was dealing with an imprisoned father, lawyers, prosecutors, trial dates, as well as the possibility of his dad spending life in prison so her own ex-boyfriend issues could be handled on her own. She didn't want Johnny to have anything else on his already overfilled plate…and that included him not knowing about her avoidance of her apartment.

Resolutely, Ash quietly reached for the music sheets she dropped and was about to bail without seeing him.

Yet Ash froze for a second, suddenly grateful for this twist of fate. Perhaps Johnny was just like her; couldn't sleep and came to practice (as she was aware he did at times) and this was an opportunity she couldn't pass up. If she played her cards right, maybe she could convince him to crash on her couch. The thought of it having her heart hammering slightly for reasons she didn't care to ponder long but more importantly, Johnny's presence in her apartment could possibly scare off Lance for good with Johnny's sheer size alone (even though it was a nice thought to think of Johnny drop-kicking Lance to the next town over - she'd give her next three paychecks to see that).

Mind made up along with the slight curiosity as to why Johnny would show up so late, Ash approached the direction of the noise.

Looking up, she saw this part of the theater that wasn't normally frequented; extra unused dressing rooms and bathrooms with a few pieces of furniture scattered in an adjacent room. A hint of doubt still lingering, Ash reached for the door and silently pushed it open; beyond thankful when it didn't squeak and give away her position.

Looking into the lamp-lit room, she immediately took in the statuesque Johnny standing by an window he was closing behind him. She smiled lightly at his turned back that faced her. Mouth agape, Ash was about to speak out to hopefully scare him a bit but before she could utter a "boo!", he suddenly turned around.

Ash's heart lodged in her throat and tongue frozen in her mouth.

Praying that what she was seeing was merely side-effects of her severe lack of sleep or too much damn caffeine but what was in front of her was brutal reality and Ash could scarcely believe her eyes.

Johnny was _completely_ fucked up.

Hair and fur mussed up and matted in places with a dark substance which she refused to believe was blood, right eye nearly swollen shut, gray cheeks battered and bruised with horrifying traces of smeared blood on the edges of his wide lips and nostrils, lower lip swollen, hairy knuckles bloodied…and that was the parts of his body she _could_ see. Who knows what the hell was going on underneath his green sweater and leather jacket?

The strong desire to pinch herself was stronger than she could ever recall.

 _This couldn't be happening…_

This was _Johnny_ \- the kind, sweet, shy, soulful, gentle giant that she considered her best friend. Someone who was always there for her and a shoulder to lean on ever this whole crazy competition happened…and now, he was hurt. Johnny - the gentlest guy you could ever hope to meet was horrifically injured. The questions of 'Why' and 'How' predominant in her mind as she stared at him. **None** of it made sense! Just what the hell happened!?

Icy blue eyes were now blurring with sudden tears she didn't even care to pay attention to, Ash abruptly screamed out in horror, not caring how poor Johnny shook; utter fear filling his eyes (well, the one that wasn't swollen shut anyway) and jumping a few inches in the air at her voice and announced presence.

" **What the** _ **hell**_ **happened** **to you?!"**


	2. Encounter

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 2**

 **Rated: T**

 **Encounter**

 _Chapter Summary: Ash confronts Johnny about his injuries - and finds out about something much more horrific…_

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 **OMG y'all, I cannot the believe the support I already got for this story. It's astounding! Thank you all so much and I hope you continue to enjoy the angsty feels trip. ;-)**

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" **What the** _ **hell**_ **happened to you?!"**

" _...A-Ash?_ " It took a few long drawn out moments for Johnny to mutter the word out and as suspected with a bloody, slightly swollen nose, it was fairly nasally spoken.

"W-What are you doing 'ere?" he ultimately decided to be coy, stepping back even if he knew there was no mistaking what was obvious in the dim light of the room.

"I could ask you the same question - but _seriously_ , Johnny! What the **hell** happened to you?!" Ash whimpered, fiercely kept it on topic even if her throat felt tight and the image of him was blurry with cloying tears. None of this made a damn lick of sense! She desperately needed answers and she needed them _now_!

"N-Nothing." Johnny uttered abruptly, " _Nothing_ happened! I jus' got a bit banged up when I fell off my skateboard." Johnny muttered the last part as an excuse but Ash was not buying it whatsoever.

Ash took a few seconds to try and absorb that outlandish lie; icy blue eyes flickering to said skateboard that was now propped up against the wall.

Johnny was masterful in the sport of skateboarding. Ash recalled him doing insanely difficult tricks that had her fur rise and prickle, spine tensing during the many times she watched him messing about with the skateboard in the parking lot at his place. He was absolutely incredible on it and by his explanation, had been riding since he was seven years old. There was no way in hell Johnny would have fallen from it and gotten as hurt as he did.

Perhaps a scraped palm or bloodied knee, but _nothing_ like this…

Crossing her arms tightly over her chest which was still frantically throbbing upon the sight of him, Johnny suddenly began walking further into the better lighting as if trying to escape her harsh stare and words - he only looked worse. The sight of dark purple blotches of bruising on his cheek and knuckles had her swallowing back a lump. The crusted, dried blood obviously smeared across his face where the stains nearer his nostrils and leaking from his bottom lip was more fresh; a startling crimson that glistened on his gray skin.

Ash was having a hard time keeping herself from sobbing at the sight; the silent tears still drifting downward into the fur of her face but she ignored them. None of this made any sense and Johnny's excuses were forced and small - obvious lies. Johnny had never been a good liar, but the fact he was even attempting to do so worried her greatly.

"You're **shitting** me! You did not." It took a few seconds, but she finally spoke and Johnny flinched at the accusation.

Ash was sure to retain her feisty nature throughout these traumatic moments as if it was the only thing to hold onto. Desperately trying not to appear as shell-shocked as she really was. There was still a sensation of jittery electricity in the air - neither necessarily expecting each others presence tonight and if she was at all honest with herself, didn't appreciate these circumstances either.

Without uttering another excuse or flat-faced lie, Johnny decided to run.

Walking away from her, his back presented as he headed toward the dressing/bath rooms. It just dawned on her now that Johnny just walked away without answering her…

 _Johnny_ _ **never**_ _did that!_

…and Ash was not going to take it…

She quickly wiped her sodden face on her sleeve to help clear her vision before sprinting past him and standing with her arms stretched wide in front of him. Pathetic excuse for blocking since her arms were so short to do much in the way of impeding him but she had to try anyway.

"Where do you think you're going!? You haven't answered me, Johnny!" she said louder than intended but it didn't have it's normal effect for he decided to ignore her accusations and he slipped passed her short arm-barrier without a single word.

Once the shock wore off that it actually occurred, Ash belted out.

" **Seriously**!? You're really not going to _answer_ me?!" Ash demanded, having to jog to keep up with his much longer strides (even if he, try as he might to hide it, was obviously walking with a worrisome limp).

Johnny still remained silent upon reaching the dressing rooms; refusing to look at her as he turned on the bright florescent lights of the bathrooms. Flinching a bit as he stole a glance of himself in the mirror; averting his eyes to the floor before he continued closer to the sinks that lined the one wall. Bathroom stalls and dressing rooms lining the wall just to their right.

In the bright lights of this new environment, Ash was bombarded with things she never imagined she'd witness. Aside from the obvious injuries, bruises and blood, Johnny's clothes were wrinkled, covered in dust and scratches scattered over the canvas of his signature leather jacket, green jumper, and the knees of his jeans. Even the front of his beloved Converse shoes were scuffed and tattered to all hell as if he'd just ran a marathon...and was that specks of dried blood?

Inwardly, Ash was praying this wasn't happening but the ache that twisted her stomach painfully in her abdomen told her it was horrible reality.

 _It was becoming far too much for her to take - like the whole world as she knew it was caving in._

" **Johnny**! Just _tell_ me! How did you get hurt and don't you _dare_ give me that bullshit of you falling off your skateboard!" Ash abruptly yelled in sheer frustration and barely concealed emotional agony; her tiny fists trembling by her sides as she stared up at him.

The gorilla didn't answer immediately as he approached a line of sinks and stopped in front of one near the middle. Ash's mouth was open and ready to spew out more fearful accusations and questions when Johnny suddenly spoke.

"...I already told you what happened…" he muttered under his breath; eyes refusing to even flicker in her direction.

"You mean you **lied** to me!" Ash shouted and she didn't miss how his shoulders flinched at her harsh words, "You're a lousy liar, Johnny, and you _know_ it!"

"..."

" **Johnny!** "

"...you're in the men's room…" Johnny grumbled whilst turning on the tap; actually believing changing the subject would work this time.

He was sadly mistaken.

"Oh _puh-_ _ **lease**_. We're the only ones here and I highly doubt your gonna be whipping your junk out in front of me so I _really_ don't care about that. Now, are you going to fucking tell me why it looks like your face got well-acquainted with a brick wall about, I dunno, a dozen times! …Or am I gonna have to start guessing?"

Johnny didn't respond to her goading; running his hands underneath the tap to wash his hands and the blood off his knuckles as Ash remained staring slack-jawed at his profile. His darkened brown eyes steadfast on his task; she hated the pain she saw in the normally bright chestnut gaze…The spell of anger she'd been under abruptly fell away and her fists unclenched and remained loose at her sides.

"...Johnny," her voice was much less forceful this time around.

Ash finally accepted that approaching this in anger was going absolutely nowhere. It was instead just turning into a one-sided screaming match so Ash decided to take a few deep breaths to keep her calm for perhaps he would better respond to it.

She was wrong.

"It's none of your business." he whispered and she barely heard him over the rushing water and pounding of her rapid pulse in her ears.

"E-Excuse me?"

"I said, it's _none_ of your business." he said more forcefully this time around but it was still half the volume of a normal speaking voice. It was obvious Johnny wasn't prone to raising his voice other than during a belting chorus of a song.

Silence reigned for a moment before she inwardly composed herself and spoke gentle words she hoped he would respond better to.

"You're my best friend so you kind of _are_ my business…"

"..." Johnny refused to reply.

"Johnny…" Ash sighed, arms tightening around herself as if to semi-control her absurd panic; quell her frantic needs to scream, to cry, demand to know what happened. Another deep breath exiting her trembling mouth before she trusted herself to continue speaking.

"Johnny - it's Ash. You know, if you've forgotten. You can talk to me - you've always been able to talk to me before." Her words were calm, gentle as she stared at him hoping against hope that he'd at least look at her.

Silently recalling all the times he was such an open book to her regarding his life outside of the sweet soulful singer he showcased to the world. He told her all about imprisoned father and the gang activity leading up to the arrest (even Johnny's own involvement), tragically deceased mother, and even most of his life back in London. Ash had grown to know him so well throughout the course of this crazy rollercoaster ride of the competition, rebuilding, and where they were now. At this moment, she was frankly terrified as to why he was hiding such pertinent information from her now of all times…a time when he seemingly needed it most.

"Johnny, **please**." the words felt quite foreign on her tongue as she choked them out, "I-I'm just…" she sighed, "I want to know what happened to you - that's all. Just tell me what happened…I want to help."

"..."

"Did you get in a fight or something? I mean, hell, I know your always having to fight of the hoards of crazed fangirls but this is ridiculous." Ash chuckled out; trying a different tactic to break something out of him; anything! She was slowly going out of her mind with desperation for some kind of explanation.

"..." He didn't budge.

"C'mon. You can tell me anything. I'm sure we can work it ou -"

" **Nothing's going on!** " Johnny suddenly yelled and Ask stepped back in pure shock. She had never once heard Johnny raise his voice outside of singing and hearing him address her in such a way scared the hell out of her.

"Johnny." she whispered out his name; chest heaving with frantic breaths.

Johnny was finally looking at her; the shock in his eyes giving her the indication he didn't intend to do that whatsoever. They left her almost immediately when he turned back toward the sink; slumped forward on the porcelain and for a long time, she just listened to him breathing. Hands obviously shaking as he shut off the tap.

"...Ash, 'm sorry. B-But I'm okay. It's okay! Nothing happened that you need to worry about… I-It turned out just fine! Alright!? Now _please_ just drop it!" he said much quieter this time but she still heard the uncommon fire lacing his voice and if anything, it made her more determined to get some answers.

" **No!** " she shouted and Johnny flinched at the reverberating demand, "I-I'm **not** going to drop it! Look at yourself! What happened?" Ash met his voice with her own forceful tone.

"..."

"Johnny?!" she growled.

"..."

" **JOHNNY!** " she shouted and tried approaching him but he moved; stepping outside of her grasp as she tried getting closer to him.

Ignoring how he was dodging her small paw from clasping onto his arm, he suddenly twisted his torso and like something out of a horrific horror movie; Johnny let out a blood-curdling scream and collapsed to the ground in an unceremonious heap.

Ash froze; eyes wider than should have been possible as he suddenly fell to the floor, clutching his side.

"Oi, fu-" Johnny muttered; pain lacing every iota of that broken curse.

"Johnny!" Ash screamed out in terror; running to him without caring how much he just tried to avoid her touch. The sheer shock of seeing him doubled over on the floor where he was just standing tall in front of her.

It tore her heart to pieces…

Johnny didn't move other than a few tremors that ran through his body as he pushed himself to sit up against a nearby wall. Hand shaking as he clutched at his side; a good half a foot below his right armpit.

Ash was able to approach him; ignoring his wide, terror filled eyes when she pulled at his hand that clutched his side. A look flashed across his face but she didn't have time to read it. Gently, she pulled at his hand and as if accepting of whatever fate awaited him; Johnny's face fell as he allowed her to pull his hand away and open his jacket.

What greeted her had whole world screeching to a terrifying halt.

Tiny hand stilled as she stared at the red stain that had been hidden so well by the leather barrier; blood-soaked green shirt and a slit in the fabric was all too obvious…

This was no accident or random fist fight -

 _Johnny had been stabbed…_


	3. Confrontation

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 3**

 **Rated: T**

 **Confrontation**

 _Chapter Summary: Ash tries to get some answers from Johnny as to how he acquired his injuries - it's a lot harder than she expects._

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 **Again, I can't** **than** **k** **y'all for the endless support you've shown me! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy the chapter! xoxo**

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Ash wasn't even fully aware of what was happening since her eyes locked onto the horrific injury. Vision blurring with unshed tears as she stared in abhorrent shock at the slit in his green jumper and the blood pooling around it. Some of the blood drenching it is dry, dark and clinging to the fibers of the shirt but also way too obvious that some was far too fresh. Johnny dodging her hand as she tried to help him must have injured him further…and that killed her.

This whole situation was outright horrifying.

It had to be a dream or some kind of demented nightmare for who on earth would hurt him? Johnny would never even fathom hurting another soul; so gentle and kind to everyone he met - what cruel, heartless person could actually stab him?!

… _just what the hell happened…?!_

Ash had grown completely unaware of how she was practically hyperventilating; eyes blurring with tears as she stared at the obvious stab wound Johnny had acquired…

The worst part was he still refused to tell her what took place tonight…

"Oh God, Johnny… **Oh my** _ **God**_ **!** " she screamed, hand moving to cover her mouth in the sheer horror of what she was witnessing. Something inside of her chest shattered at the reality she was being faced with and yet, Johnny refused to clarify whatsoever.

"It's alright! _I'm_ alright! Everything turned out fine!" Johnny muttered, trying fruitlessly to pull away from her but found he didn't have the energy; only able to scoot up a bit further against the cold tiles of the wall. Part of him wished to flee, but Ash had already seen the wound and it was too late to hide it now.

Ash pushed her hand forward, ignoring Johnny flinching at her action but not caring in the least, as she touched the stained cloth around the wound she still had yet to see in its brutal entirety. Anxiety steadily began building in her gut; all too aware of the amount of blood staining his shirt and the fur underneath.

 _Just so much blood…_

Lungs filling with frigid air; chest a gaping wound as she continually stared at it; confronting the reality that this indeed happened to Johnny - this wasn't a nightmare but brutal reality.

Yet, the questions still lingered like a horrible overcast shadow - Who did this? _Why_ would anyone hurt him? How could this have happened to someone like him? Someone who had never hurt anybody…

Absolutely **none** of this made sense and Johnny tried to hide it from her; pulling away and treating it as if it was NOTHING! That he wasn't stabbed and possibly bleeding to death and something inside of her snapped.

"What the **hell** do you mean you're alright?!" something in Ash finally broke; the words came out choked and raspy but she found out she didn't fucking care. All she wanted was answers and dammit, she wanted them now.

"..."

"How can you possibly be okay?! You call this fine?!" the voice that came out of her mouth was so incredibly raw; the pain etched in it made Johnny flinch back a bit.

"..."

"...and what if it **hadn't**!? WHAT?" Ash continually shouted not even giving him time to ponder any sort of response..

"I-I don't…." Johnny tried to speak but Ash didn't let him finish.

"I'll tell you - you would have **died** , Johnny. That…that tomorrow, you'd never show up for work. I-I would gonna call your phone and you don't answer. T-T-That I'd be watching the news and find out my best friend had been killed and found dead i-in some ditch or dirty alley somewhere…Is that _**okay**_ to you!?" Ash yelled, voice breaking and eyes misting over as she stared angrily at him.

Johnny grew completely silent; his chestnut eyes falling from her drilling gaze.

"This is _not_ okay, Johnny. It's **not**. You're not… B-But before I argue with you anymore, I-I need to call an ambulance. You need to go the hospital!" she muttered more to herself as she reached into her skirt pocket to retrieve her phone when suddenly Johnny's hand was on hers and effectively blocking her from her task.

"NO!" he shouted and Ash's quills prickled on end…she had never heard Johnny shout like that and apparently, he hadn't either by how surprised he was when it came out.

"I-I'm sorry Ash…I…B-But, no…I-I-I _can't_ go to the hospital." Johnny continued as almost an afterthought, pulling in on himself; his arms wound tight around his waist in a fruitless yet desperate attempt to keep his wound out of sight and out of mind for her. Needless to say, it didn't work.

A few moments passed before Ash found her voice again.

"Heh. W-Why not? In case you haven't noticed - you got fucking **stabbed**!" Ash said a lot more calmly than she felt at the moment. Her heart was beating a million miles an hour and her head was aching something fierce. None of this made sense and the horrific nature of what exactly took place tonight was driving her out of her fucking mind and now he refused to go to the hospital?!

A part of her questioning if any of this was really happening…

"Ash, please…I-I _can't_. Alright?" Johnny avoided her gaze the best he could but all it succeeded in doing was for her to keep drawing her eyes to the bloody stain in his jumper his hands didn't bother to hide anymore. The crimson leaking into the green staunchly contrasted and one thing for sure, Ash would never associate those two colors with Christmas ever again…

"...Why the hell not?" Ash asked steadily, doing her best to stay calm in this hellish situation.

"I-I…"

"Why _not_ , Johnathan?" she growled, using his full name as a last resort.

"...because I can't bloody _afford_ it, Ashley!" he growled back while using the same dirty tactic on her.

Ash's eyes narrowed at the use of her full first name (the ones her parents would use to especially ruffle her quills) and context but it worked for a moment, she had to give him that. All she wanted to know is when she became the one being disciplined in this situation.

Yet Ash wouldn't be silenced, "C'mon, you have to have _some_ kind of insurance or something! Hell, even Moon has those that need it on that one program of his."

"...Ash…I'm bloody **broke**. I have _nothing_ , alright? Nearly every cent I make is going to my dad's high-end lawyer - if I miss just one payment - just **one** \- he'll drop my dad as a client, and…I-I can't let that happen. I just can't…"

"So, let me get this straight - you've been stabbed yet won't call the ambulance - will you at least call the police? Because dammit, Johnny, I'm not stupid - someone did this to you and they're still out there! What's to say they won't do it again?"

Johnny turned his face away; gaze steadfast off to some far off point before mumbling out, "I _can't_ call the police..."

"...why the hell not? What if they're still looking for you and want to finish the job? You want those maniacs on the street?"

"I can't call the police because I don't want my dad to know! If the police find out, word will get to him…I know it will."

"Heh. I hate to put a hitch in your plans, but your dad is going to notice especially when you show up looking like this!" Ash didn't mean to yell, she really didn't, but she couldn't help it. Looking at Johnny's battered and blood smeared face broke something precious in her.

"I-I'll just tell him I was busy with work. I can get away with that since it's not really a lie. I just won't go see him until I've fully healed." Johnny shrugged and Ash's countenance fell.

"...does he have something to do with this?" It was like a light went on in her head; recalling Johnny telling her his father's extensive criminal history. How many years he'd been the leader of a gang that worked with a seedy under-network of criminals to steal vast amounts of cash and other goods. Johnny's father was almost like a kingpin - it shocked her how his son turned out so squeaky clean and not a bad bone in his body with a father like that. His mother must have been one hell of a good woman…

It had been long drawn out minutes but Johnny still hadn't answered the question and to Ash, that was an immediate 'yes' whether he wanted to admit it or not. Sometimes Johnny's silence was more telling than him speaking - she could read his eyes better anyway. The boy wore his heart on his sleeve.

"Johnny, why don't you want your father to know?" Ash asked; thinking perhaps a different tactic was in order if she wanted him to keep talking.

"..." Johnny remained silent.

"Look, if whatever happened tonight was somehow the result of your father's involvement in any way - this isn't _your_ problem. What's the problem with telling him about it?"

"...Ash, my dad very may spend the rest of his life behind bars…" Johnny sighed and it wasn't news to her but the way he said it with his shoulders slumped and the saddest expression on his face hurt her like hell. "Yet, with this lawyer, he could possibly be out in as little as ten years - and…I want that. I-I want my dad out of that place. To have some kind of future…He's all I have left and I…I want to bring him _home_." he whimpered the last part; tears filling his chestnut eyes and it broke her heart in two.

"..." Ash didn't know what to say so she remained silent.

"If I told him what was happening - hell, even if word got out that I got me arse kicked by anybody - I have no doubt in my mind that my dad would break out of that prison again to murder whoever did it." Johnny muttered and Ash was surprised by Johnny's use of profanity, but seeing how emotionally and physically battered as he was right now - it seemed well warranted.

"The wardens and prosecutors already warned us that if he tries that stunt again…it's automatic life without parole…" his teary eyes finally met hers and the pain lacing them shocked her to her very core, "Ash, my dad would _die_ in prison…I can't let that happen…I just can't." Johnny finished with a sigh, a shaking hand lifting to wipe at his face; flinching when he touched his swollen flesh and Ash was so tempted to pull his hand away so he didn't further hurt himself but she didn't.

Ash froze - staring as Johnny as if for the first time.

Realizing now just how selfless this guy was - always thinking of others and scarcely of himself. It hurt that as open as he was with her, he never bothered to tell her any of this; that for as close as they were in and out of the theater, he never mentioned the demons he was secretly battling.

On the tip of her tongue, she wanted to argue, to rebel against the harsh realities he told her. To tell him to call the police and ambulance to get him more help and catch the assholes that hurt him, but a part of her knew Johnny wouldn't allow it. Didn't want to go against his wishes and rupture this relationship she had with him - refused to _ever_ let that happen…

It left Ash with only one choice…

"Fine. Since the ambulance and even calling the police is off the table - let me help at least clean up your wounds." Ash offered and for one of the few times tonight, Johnny met her eyes.

"Oi, Ash, you don't 'ave to. These are my problems - not yours."

"...I want to. Now come on." Ash offered a shaking paw which she just noticed had a few splotches of his blood staining her fur. It bothered her immensely but she ignored it for now to keep her offer open.

"...A-Ash, I…"

" _Please_." the words felt so foreign on her tongue, "I want to help you, Johnny…Let me help you."

The offer of her hand extended; Johnny's eyes flicking from the proffered hand to her face and back again as if trying to figure out of here was any ulterior motive but there was none in those crystal blue eyes.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he'd given her a stiff nod before taking her hand.


	4. Suture

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 4**

 **Rated: T**

 **Suture**

 _Chapter Summary: Johnny agrees to let Ash wrap up his injuries but is he willing to tell her exactly what happened?_

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 **Thanks again for your constant support in the form of comments, faves, follows, kudos, bookmarks, etc.! You guys are amazing! Hope you enjoy! xoxo**

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Ash felt somewhat relieved when Johnny took her hand. The gentle grasp of the smooth skin of his fingers pressing into her short fur and sensitive fingertips gave her a strange sense of alleviation she hadn't felt in awhile.

 _It wasn't much…but it was a start._

Silence was deafening as Johnny released her hand to begin making his way to his feet; needing to hold onto a nearby sink to get enough bearings to make it up without causing further damage to his stab wound. Ash watched with bated breath and an utter feeling of helplessness as Johnny finally struggled to stand; desperately wanting to help him up but knew with her fragile strength, she simply couldn't. Eyes slipping to his right side, Ash noticed his free trembling hand was covering the wound and keeping it from her eyes but she knew it was there…

Once he'd gained his balance, another question suddenly plagued her - just how the _hell_ was she going to help him?

Ash wasn't a doctor by the stretch of anyone's imagination and the most she'd ever done was applied a band-aid to a cut or an Ace bandage to Lance's ankle the one time he idiotically twisted it by jumping off the table while drunkly performing with his buddies. This was a fucking stab wound! She wasn't even aware of a first aid kit or even a clean place to try and patch Johnny up…w-what was she supposed to do?

Luckily, Johnny spoke up for her and put those doubts to rest.

"I-I have some stuff in my locker we could use - first-aid kit and whatnot."

"You use the lockers here?" she asked; the four upright lockers (which she scarcely knew existed) nearby hadn't been touched but when Ash flitted her eyes toward Johnny and what he was doing, she was shocked by what she seen.

Inside the locker he hastily opened was a medium-sized pile of nicely folded clothes, a rolled-up blanket, toothbrush, toothpaste, and other items such as soap and a few washcloths as you would use if you were taking a shower…but why would Johnny need those items _here_?

Slowly, it began dawning on her as she saw so many of his essential items here and perhaps why he had come here tonight…

"Y-You've been staying here." Ash muttered out more like a statement than a question; her voice was calm and quiet but it still froze Johnny's hands anyway. Hands that now gripped a rather large first-aid kit he kept hidden behind the rolled up blanket near the back of the gray metal locker.

"...Yeah." he answered truthfully when he pulled out the first-aid kit before closing the locker with a soft clink of metal on metal.

There was a million and one questions Ash still had lingering in the back of her mind but it wasn't the time nor the place to get them answered. Johnny was badly hurt and right now, they didn't matter as much as getting him the help he so desperately needed.

Ash felt a bit strange when she followed a limping Johnny from the bathrooms to the foyer where she first seen him when he approached a door hidden beside some metal file cabinets. Upon opening it, she saw a rather small room that had nothing more than a burnished gray couch, worn wooden coffee table placed in front of it, and a desk on the far side with a small blue lamp sitting atop it. Yet, instead of any light coming from said lamp, most of the light filtering inside was from massive windows to the right of the couch. The illuminating glow from the moon and city gave off a beautiful rich bluish-white glow into the rather quaint room.

It was strange to realize she was now just finding out this room existed.

"I uh, was falling asleep one day during practice and Mr. Moon apparently had enough of me nodding off so he took me to this room and told me to take a nap and come back when I was useful again." Johnny said with a shrug; walking over and placing the first-aid kit upon the scratched wooden surface of the coffee table. "I never seen the room before then - H-He told me he doesn't use it much…and said I was welcome to use it when I needed to, so…yeah…" his voice trailed off slowly.

Ash wanted to ask him about his reasoning for staying here and just how long it had been going on but those questions faded when a slight motion from him caught her attention. Ever so gingerly, Johnny began pulling off his leather jacket; careful not to move his arms more than necessary, he slipped his arms out of the leather until the garment puddled behind him with a soft whoosh of the leather hitting the carpet.

Now that the blockage of black was gone, Ash became all too aware of how big the blood stain was; drenching his signature green jumper. Ash silently approached the couch and waited for him to remove his shirt. Averting her eyes to give some semblance of privacy even if she'd be seeing him shirtless regardless.

It was the principle of it she supposed…

"I can't really lift up my arms - it pulls too much." Johnny grunted a moment later, dropping the fabric back at his waist.

Ash wanted to ask how he was able to climb into the window of the Moon Theater in such a state but much could be said for sheer adrenaline. Adrenaline that would have well worn-off by now as it had for her even. Ash saw the predicament he was in with his limited mobility and knew what had to be done.

"Here. Come sit in front of me." she guided, having him sit on the couch as she stood up behind him. He seemed rather confused but said nothing as he gently placed himself down.

"You think lifting your arms is bad to try and get a shirt off, try dealing with a back full of spikes your whole life." she chuckled a bit as she lifted up his shirt. Heart beating for reasons she _really_ didn't want to think about when she felt the combination of hardened muscle and soft fur of his back brushing along her palms and wrists. Ever so gently, she pulled his shirt up over his back until the green jumper bunched up around his broad shoulders.

"Well, that's as far as my arms can go," she shrugged, his height a bit daunting even as he was sitting down but it was enough to where he could grab the fabric and pull it off of his head with very little effort.

"Thank you." he replied; looking over at her across the expanse of his broad shoulder; a soft smile on his face that didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Yeah…Now," Ash muttered as she pulled up her sleeves til the fabric folded near her elbow, "Let's see how bad this is."

Johnny flinched a bit but nodded, scooting a bit to try and present his side to her but the angle was far too uncomfortable to stay in this position relatively long for either of them.

"This isn't working," she sighed, "Listen, I-I'll think of something but first, I need to get those washcloths in your locker. It would make this much easier for me to clean you up a bit first."

"Oi, sorry. I should have thought of that…"

"It's okay. I'll be right back." she quickly reassured before leaving the room for a moment.

Heart hammering a million miles an hour without any guarantee of slowing. The painful situation was finally sinking in and taking its toll on her already battered heart; she _hated_ seeing Johnny in this way. He'd normally been always so handsome and happy and seeing his face so bruised and bloody, his spirit broken really hit hard.

Feet dragging a bit as she made her way back in front of the lockers; taking only a moment to grab the white washcloths from his locker before turning and finding a sink meant for someone more her height. First thing she did then was wash her hands; tensing at the pink color that blended with the soap and slipped down the drain. Once her hands were thoroughly clean, she ran the cloths underneath the tap with hot water knowing she would have to be wiping away a lot of dried blood and the warmer, the better.

Once that task was complete, she quickly returned to the room where Johnny waited quietly. Noticing how he had stood up in the meantime; placing his cell phone, wallet and keys upon the wooden table. The first-aid kit splayed open and a few items already taken out and scattered upon the surface. Why he even had that in his locker was concerning (the whole damn situation was) but she didn't want to push it now.

"I think to make this easier, you need to be laying down…Uh, here, let me go first." Ash said, climbing on the couch and sitting toward one headrest.

"Um…J-Just lay in front of me." She tried to play coy but seeing him in nothing but low-rise jeans, black belt, and shoes was different to say the least. Ash had never seen him shirtless before and he was not built like Lance was. All hardened muscle, fur, and the gray skin of his chest was very distracting but nothing compared to the darkened bruises that now lay upon it; disrupting what would have normally been a very appealing sight. His stab wound stood out way too much; the fur surrounding a dark reddish black that didn't belong on his once flawless complexion.

Johnny hesitated; hands rubbing together before he finally approached her and sat down one seat beside her before he began reclining to lay down. The weight of his body a bit heavy as he rested his shoulder-blades atop her thighs; adjusting a bit to give her the best working conditions she could; his wound now level with her chest and in all of its horrible reality.

"Is that alright?" he asked, shifting his weight off her much he could and to ease his mind, she slipped a bit from under him so he could be less tense.

"Y-Yeah, uh, it's fine." she swallowed thickly, eyes scarcely leaving the horrific wound - it all seemed that much more alarming now that she was staring at it without the barrier of his clothing.

Ash gingerly touched the fur surrounding; hating the dampness her fingertips encountered. As gently as possible, she moved closer to where his fur was now stained with red.

"C-Can you hand me a rag?" she asked and he did a moment later. As gently as she possible could, she wiped around the wound until most of the crimson blood had been removed and was now staining the once-white rag.

Ash was silent, eyes blurring as fresh tears rose without her consent.

Wiping away the moisture sticking to her eyelashes before she continued on the task at hand. If this was any other circumstance and Johnny was shirtless, her face would have been flushed, but seeing the wound now just made her sick to her stomach. It was covered mostly by his thick black fur but the more she cleaned it and brushed the thick fur back, the puncture wound became far too obvious in the light the moon steadily provided.

Ash grew silent as she stared at the parting of gray flesh hidden beneath his fur; the interior dark red along the little more than one-inch gash. Feeling gently around, she felt the obvious sensation of his hard rib right underneath the wound…

… _that's what saved him…_

To think if it had been one inch off and slipped between his ribs; how he could have gotten a punctured lung, liver, or even depending on the length of the knife, could have meant instant death if they'd severed a main artery…

"Ouch!" Johnny flinched when she probed at his rib. "S'rry, it's a bit tender."

"I bet it's been nicked." she thought aloud, still focused on her task even if she felt her hands starting to shake a bit from her plaguing anxiety.

"Yeah... I felt it." Johnny let out a soft chuckle and she suddenly felt sick how he could be joking about such a thing but said nothing. "So…is it bad?"

"Well, I can't just fucking put a band-aid on it." she chuckled mirthlessly; the overwhelming feeling of anxiousness burrowed deep under her skin and prickled along every nerve with little hope of alleviation. Taking a deep breath to compose herself, she was more surprised when Johnny handed her a small suture set from the first-aid kit.

"...Why do you have all this stuff?"

"My dad always told me to be prepared and with all his heists, it was always helpful to have one around and I guess I never grew out of it." his answer was vague at best but it was one she would have to accept for now.

Ash gingerly took the kit from his hands and read the short instructions printed out on the side. Looking back down at his wound, she knew it was the only option she had. With a deep sigh, she set to work.

"Hand me the alcohol first. I need to clean it."

Johnny did as she asked and lay still again.

Ever so gently, Ash ripped open the small package of alcohol wipes and began dabbing them along the fur surrounding and finally along the broken skin. Johnny flinched at the burn but for the most part, remained still; clenching his fists and teeth at whatever pain it caused.

Ash noticed his reaction to the alcohol but said nothing; just continued dabbing it lightly among the red slit; making sure the area was clean before she could start on the next step. A few moments later, she pulled back the alcohol wipes now smeared with blood but leaving the wound as clean as she could hope for in this situation. Once she placed it aside, she took one more glance at the instructions of the sutures and began her work.

Unsteady hands working at the stitch material for minutes that seemed to go on for years; the material annoyingly kept getting stuck to the fur on her fingers making it seem that much longer. Ever so gently, she swallowed down her more squeamish side and pushed the parted skin together before gingerly pushing the thin needle through his skin and essentially sewing him back together.

All the while, Johnny trembled and flinched at the pain of putting pressure on it and the sensation of the needle piercing his skin, and the last thing she expected was him to speak during this...

"...It was an old rival gang of my fathers..." Johnny suddenly muttered out after a silence that seemed to encompass the whole room in a cloud of smoke and Ash's hands froze above her work.


	5. Alleviation

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 5**

 **Rated: T**

 **Alleviation**

 _Chapter Summary: Ash continually tends to his wounds as Johnny struggles to admit to her what happened tonight._

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 **LOL. I had no idea this little plot bunny would get this out of hand but actually, it's going to end up to be longer than previously intended. Hope y'all don't mind. ;-3**

 **Also, thank you so much for the constant support! Hope you enjoy! xoxo**

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"...it was an old rival gang of my fathers…" the words that filtered from Johnny's mouth were barely audible but it still caused a chill to slip down her spine - one she swore she'd never experienced before.

Ash's hands froze above her work; a mixture of uneasy trepidation and anxiety that had been steadily rising all night was now at an all time high with those nine words. To physically hear there was some type of reasoning didn't make his injuries any less worse or the pain any less severe considering it was his father's old gang doings that caused his son to get hurt tonight. The father Johnny was doing everything in his power to try and get a lighter sentence; one who Johnny would visit as often as possible and spoke so highly of - it was inadvertently because of _him_ that Johnny almost got killed tonight...

The porcupine swallowed down the abrupt burn of anger, complicated frustrations at this entire damn situation before she trusted herself to speak.

"B-But - W-what…" a flustered sigh fell from her lips, "What do they want with **you**?" her voice was terse, tense as she spoke, "You've never done anything to them, right? So why would they target you?"

Johnny grew silent for a long moment; chestnut-colored eyes not really focused on anything; rather lost in his head and stewing over the words he ought to say next and struggling with muttering out anything.

Ash, sorely tempted to ask again to try and speed up the answer, remained silent; worried that perhaps with goading, he wouldn't answer her prodding questions.

It was a miracle he was opening up at all so she did _not_ intend to screw it up.

Yet, after long drawn out and rather awkwardly silent moments, it was obvious he didn't intend to speak further…at least not yet. With this latest acknowledgment, Ash let out a sigh before reluctantly continued to work on stitching his wound closed if only to keep her hands and mind occupied. Hands that were unsteady and shaking a bit from the stress but she was determined to finish what she started.

The events of this evening began hitting her all at once and Ash could have laughed at the ironic bitterness of it all. How little her problems seemed in comparison to this - holding absolutely no fortitude whatsoever in her minuscule mishaps back at her apartment. Lance may have been loud and annoying as all hell but was not threatening whatsoever. And here was Johnny - dealing with ex-gang rivals who didn't hesitate to try and end his life tonight for what she assumed was no reason other than simple association…

That thought of tonight going differently began holding connotations she was in **no** mood to confront.

Anger, hurt, and deep-stemming anxiety was steadily building in her gut only intensified when she neared the final few stitches. Gently slipping the needle into his skin a few more times more for good measure before suddenly, Johnny was offering her a small pair of scissors which she took into shaking paws. The last stitch in place a moment later, Ash gingerly cut the final string.

Looking back her handiwork, Ash had to admit that unsteady hands were not the best in this situation; work a bit crooked and bumpy but it would at least keep it closed and clean. It was the only relief Ash felt in this moment - that the wound wasn't terribly deep and hit his rib which most likely saved his life.

 _The fact he'd been stabbed at all was still terribly upsetting…_

"I have some gauze and tape if that'll help keep it covered." Johnny interrupted her thoughts, digging back into the first-aid kit before handing her the roll of gauze and medical tape.

On the tip of her tongue was still coercing him to go to the hospital but his earlier freak-out still reigned fresh in her mind. Ash didn't to want to push the issue because he may push her away after he'd finally began opening up, so instead she just muttered out -

"Yeah...gauze will work."

The gorilla silent as he watched her fingers brush his palm to grab the tape and in that moment, Johnny had to admit his relief with Ash being here and her willingness to help him.

Furry fingers small and dexterous - perfect for the type of work the stitching needed. His giant fingers would have been worthless in this situation; it would have been utter hell had he been forced to bandage himself up. Yet, in some ways, he hated that she was here - finding out about him basically squatting at the theater and that he'd inadvertently been caught up with his dad's past. The worst part was his best friend having to see him looking like he'd been pummeled with a runaway truck. Her beautiful blue eyes widening with concern and fear that shouldn't be there - he didn't want her to worry about him…and now he seemingly didn't have a choice.

 _It wasn't exactly how he pictured tonight going whatsoever…_

Ash said nothing further as she took the gauze; handing the needle and scissors back before she picked up the rag and alcohol pad she'd long ago discarded and gently cleaned around the now stitched wound once more for good measure. Johnny handed her another alcohol pad and she placed the package at her side before softly blowing on the stitched wound to dry it before she could think of applying the gauze. Once significantly dry, Ash began rolling it out to cover the wound but found his torso much to broad for her short arms.

"Uh…little help here?" she asked, handing him the end of the roll and Johnny took the hint.

Gingerly, he sat up. Ash's legs celebrating the release of heavy weight before she set back to work of unfurling the tape. With Johnny's help, Ash began wrapping it around his chest to significantly cover it and once repeated thrice, he held the end as she ripped off a piece of medical tape to hold it all closed.

"That's gonna hurt like a bitch taking it off but I think that'll do." Ash muttered, flitting her fingers over the thick black fur the tape would indeed pull on when he removed it.

"Eh…It's alright." he replied, looking a bit apprehensive as he tried somewhere for his eyes to focus.

Ash ignored how uncomfortable Johnny looked and one more glance to his profile gave her the next task.

"C'mere." Ash said, gently grasped at his arm and Johnny willingly went. The confused tilt of his brow apparent but Ash further ignored it as she guided him to lay back down. This time, Ash slipped her legs more by his shoulders, face near his where she could easily discern the blood still clinging to his fur and flesh marring his bruised face.

Being this close to her, Johnny felt his cheeks burn further. He told himself it was because of he felt positively exposed without a shirt and her close distance to his face but those thoughts faded when her paw had suddenly reached forward and gingerly touched the rag to his injured cheek, brushing back the thick black hair with a gentle stroke of her paw.

Johnny stared at her in astonishment, inwardly questioning if he should pull away… _but he didn't._

Silently allowing her to wipe off the blood from his aching face, the rag cooling the swelled flesh and the cold sweat he found himself in. Still filled with the anxiety and panic he'd felt during those moments he was fighting for his life and now trying to relax while in her laid-back presence. Earlier words she spoke to him calming his breathing and shaking hands.

 _This was Ash…_

Ash, his pretty best friend who was helping him; she wasn't those that hurt him tonight - not one who would judge or ridicule him for making stupid decisions. One he could tell anything to and did numerous times before. Without asking, she offered her help, stitched him up and was now running a cool rag across his battered, bloody face. Gentle strokes of the cool cloth and her hands cradling his cheek calmed him immensely. Johnny's breathing evening out and slowing as she continued the ginger brushes of the damp rag. The worries he'd just fought with; growing anxiety and nervousness, earlier panic slipping away with every stroke. The alleviation of her touch was able to calm him enough to think about what to say next.

There was no pressure from her. Just calm reassurance in her presence and touch that had him relaxing into her gentle ministrations. Neck muscles slowly un-clenching to finally fully rest his head back on the couch end nearby; her legs instantly slipping underneath the back of his neck in the process. She didn't seem to mind the weight and silently continued to clean his face of the blood he'd acquired tonight.

In this moment, a calm fell over him and he knew she deserved answers. Accepted that tonight happened - that she knew about it… and she deserved to know the full story. So, any inhibitions and any hesitation he may have still clinging to faded away and he began to speak…

"I-I don't know what they wanted with me...they didn't really say." Johnny muttered and the abrupt sound made Ash flinch slightly.

Mind awash with his words and their context, Ash couldn't help but ask the same question she'd been asking all night it seemed, "…What _happened_ tonight, Johnny? "

Johnny grew silent again, lips slightly pursed even if it appeared to cause him some discomfort before he took a deep breath; chestnut eyes glazing over a bit as he started from the beginning…

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 **I know I'm evil for breaking it up but it just seemed WAY too long to be a single chapter so I broke it up. Don't worry though - the next chapter is already finished. ;-3**


	6. Disclosure

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 6**

 **Rated: T**

 **Disclosure**

 _Chapter Summary: Johnny finally tells Ash exactly what happened tonight and everything leading up to it…_

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 **I know I was a bit evil to break this up from the last chapter but at least it was already done so you didn't have to wait too long for me to submit it. ;-3 Also, this story may branch out a little longer than previously expected. Not much though - no more than 8 chapters...I think. Anyway, hope you enjoy.**

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Johnny grew silent again, lips slightly pursed even if it appeared to cause him some discomfort before he took a deep breath; chestnut eyes glazing over a bit as he started from the beginning…

"It started a few weeks ago... I-I was heading home one night after practice and I saw these three shady looking animals hanging around the neighborhood with apparently no motive in being there. They didn't say anything to me, just kept staring as I went into the garage and shut the door behind me; i-it wasn't exactly _threatening_. Heh." Johnny chuckled mirthlessly. "I mean, it was nothing **too** out of the ordinary. it's admittedly not the best neighborhood so shady characters hanging around are to be expected. Lots of drug activity and gang hang-outs and whatnot, so I never really took it too seriously for no one ever done anything to me before. After awhile, I drummed it up to the fact that perhaps they were simply lost, high, or something easily explained away but…it didn't turn out that way."

Ash's stomach plummeted.

"I would see these same animals perhaps once a week at first, then it evolved to seeing them all the time. They didn't do or say anything to me and even stopped staring when I'd make my way into the garage but…that's when I also began noticing things moved around in my house. Doors I _know_ I closed when I left were now wide open when I returned. Objects askew, things moved from one place to another - it was obvious someone was in the house when I was gone. At first, I chalked it up to my imagination and you know as well as anyone that Buster has been having us in practice and rehearsal for so long that afterward, you're just exhausted - so, naturally I thought perhaps I was seeing things or remembering wrong." Johnny closed his eyes for a moment, shaking his head slightly, his brow brushing Ash's wrist and she couldn't help but flinch a bit at the unexpected contact.

"I-I should have realized someone was casing the house sooner - it's so painfully obvious now that they were making sure there was no security systems or alarms. Or even checking to see if someone else lived with me I guess too. Yet, nothing was stolen so I just ignored it…but then..." Johnny sighed, voice tapering off and the upcoming silence became too much for Ash.

"...but **what**?" she asked, voice trembling a bit in her throat.

Johnny swallowed a bit before answering, "Last week was when I started getting this weird feeling whenever I was at the garage. Nervousness, anxiety - I dunno why exactly, but it was stifling. I-I couldn't sleep, barely ate and kept glancing out the windows all the time for apparently no reason. Something just _didn't_ feel right whenever I was there alone, so, as I told you before, I started staying here at the theater for the past week." his face turned a bit; worried about seeing perhaps Ash's pitied look in his peripheral even if there was none.

It felt so embarrassing but he ignored it and continued.

"My gut was telling me _something_ was off; like a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach whenever I went back to the garage to retrieve more clothes or whatever I needed that day. I-I didn't _want_ to stay at the theater but I found myself not having much of a choice. I just wanted to make myself scarce and hoped whatever happened would happen when I was gone. Ya know, just let them take what they wanted; nothing much of worth in there to lose a life over." he helplessly shrugged, his shoulder brushing her side.

"...then what?" Ash gripped the thick fur covering his shoulder, teetering on every syllable that slipped off his tongue.

" _Tonight happened…_ " Johnny muttered; his brows furrowing at reliving the horrendous moments but knew he had to.

Ash swallowed thickly; not sure if she wanted to hear how Johnny acquired his horrific injuries but she _needed_ to know even if it would hurt like hell; even if it was brutal and made her want to scream and hunt those bastards down. String them up by their claws and dip them into vats of acid for daring to lay a single paw on Johnny...

As much as it hurt… _she **had** to know…_

"I was on my way home after I'd run some errands around town. Moon let us out late so I didn't finish up til around 10:00, 10:30 so I was a lot later than usual but I didn't think much of it. I focused mainly on balancing on my skateboard while riding through the alley to get to the back of the garage. My only intention to be there tonight was to shower and get some extra clothes for tomorrow's rehearsal when I saw the same three animals blocking my way... They'd **never** approached me before so naturally, my first instinct was to run…but I didn't.

"Rather, like a bloody idiot, I-I spoke to them, 'Good evening, isn't it?' I said while smiling, acting casual, all that jazz - but their expressions didn't change whatsoever. The closer I looked at them in the dimming light, I knew they were the same animals I'd been seeing around for weeks. A thought flashed suddenly that perhaps they saw me on TV, thought I was rich and planned to mug me or something," Johnny chuckled, shaking his head at the inkling of it. Hell, if they stole his wallet, they would have been sadly mistaken for there was nothing more than a five dollar bill inside the folded black leather.

"They didn't answer." Johnny continued, "Saying nothing and just staring at me with more disdain than anyone had ever had before…and remember, this coming from a chap whose own dad disowned him for awhile." Johnny smirked a bit but Ash saw the pain flashing in his eyes; hand trembling as she brushed it across his jaw in what she hoped was a comforting gesture. She was never good at these things...

"…Speaking of which, they finally spoke and all they did was mutter my father's full name and that shocked me for no one had called him that in a **long** time - not since I was a lad. He's known by his nickname even to those in his gang and for these three animals to know it in its entirety… I knew immediately that _something_ was wrong. I was frozen for a moment and in that time, the one in the middle muttered something about a massive debt my father owed them. H-How since he was in the pen now, his debts transferred to **me**. Of course, I tried playing dumb - acted like I had no idea who they were talking about but they saw right through it…Can't exactly hide the fact I look a helluva lot like my dad."

"...and you've always been a bad liar." Ash muttered, reaching out and running her hand across his head with the rag over his un-bruised cheek.

"Yeah. I know…but I had to try." he shrugged helplessly and Ash bit her lip as he continued his harrowing tale.

"Anyway, they didn't take very kindly to the fact I acted like I didn't know about them or how much my dad screwed them over. I was frozen, words failing me when I realized they weren't buying the act. After awhile, they stopped talking and rather started approaching even closer and as much as I wanted to hold my ground, they were _huge_! One steroid-jacked jaguar with a x-scar on his cheek, a gigantic crocodile with the nastiest set of teeth I've ever seen, and a wolf with mangy, ratted fur and a really bad attitude. Indeed, one of the strangest gangs I'd ever seen…and they were cornering me.

"My mind was everywhere in that moment a-and I kept telling them I hadn't the faintest idea of what they were talking about and all they kept demanding is that I pay them what my dad owed them! How he screwed them over on a deal and now it was time for payback. …I-I knew right then that this was **not** going to end well but before I could even think of an exit strategy, they just ganged up on me."

Ash's eyes widened, her breaths quick even as much as she tried to calm them. She knew how the story ended; Johnny lived but it still was horrifying to listen to what he had gone through tonight.

 _It fucking broke her heart into pieces…_

"It all happened so **fast** …" Johnny whispered; eyes glazed as he lost himself to the traumatic memory from tonight, "I-I didn't know **what** to do. The first instinct was to run but they had cornered me! I was up against this brick wall and some trash cans and they were just closing in - so I did the only thing I _could_ do - **_fight_**. The smallest was the wolf so I naturally attacked him first - socked him as hard as I could in his snout and he just _screamed_ \- warm blood squirted all over me…" he told, flexing his right hand and glancing down at his swollen knuckles with a look of disgust echoing in his tense features.

...you punched him?" Ash couldn't hide the surprise in her voice.

"Heh. Yeah…" Johnny chuckled, acknowledging how strange in fact it was, "Guess when a life and death situation rears its ugly head, you find yourself doing whatever you can to survive. Ya kinda just react and…my dad was always keen on self-defense; had me learning to box since I was in middle school." Johnny shrugged and Ash was surprised she never knew this about him.

"You box?"

"Yeah. Boxing and kickboxing mainly - it was more for exercise than anything, but hey, it came in handy."

Ash absorbed this new information for a moment until she realized the conversation got way too light for her liking - situation far too serious for them to be chatting and shooting the breeze as if everything was normal.

"T-Then what?" she asked, pushing for the final part of a story she still partly didn't want to hear.

"Yeah. Well, anyway, that bloke was out of commission; wailing and holding his bloodied face was when I was suddenly blindsided by my legs being kicked out from under me and I just fell hard on my back. From what I gathered, the croc had slammed his tail against the back of my knees and I fell like a sack of potatoes. On the ground - defenseless; the air knocked out of me and I-I couldn't _breathe_ …but I got up anyway." he spoke and Ash felt a chill go down her spine.

"At that moment, my whole body just pumping with adrenaline as the jaguar came out of nowhere and began punching me in the face - him and the crock essentially taking turns kicking my arse. I blocked their attack as much as I could but it all happened just so fast and my vision was getting all blurry when he smashed his knuckle into my eye. I could barely see and…then all of a sudden, the wolf with blood covering most of his face was snarling as he jumped over to me with the glint of a metal in his hand..."

Ash's hand left his face as she brought it up to cover her mouth; terrified she'd let out a pathetic whine or sob if she didn't stop herself. Icy eyes taking in Johnny's battered face, a faraway look in his eye and pain echoing in his features she hated seeing on his normally friendly, serene face. It killed her inside when he spoke the next six words…

"...I really thought that was it…"

"..." Tears filled Ash's eyes; pain erupting in her chest at seeing all the emotions playing out on his face - his descriptions playing in her mind's eye and it hurt **so** bad…

"Yet just something came over me and I knew I was going to die if I didn't do something. I _needed_ to get up so I had kicked the jaguar back enough to pull myself semi back to my feet and...before I knew what happened the wolf had made it to my side and…this **pain** \- it erupted under my right armpit. I couldn't feel it at first - just this force hitting my rib bone. In that moment, my body just reacted…

"I was able to throw my arm out, slamming the wolf back into the wall just enough to run out from in-between them. The croc tried to trip me but I jumped over his tail and by some twist of fate or God having mercy on me that night - my skateboard was _right_ there. I landed on it perfectly and even with my eyesight blurry and darkening, I…I was able to get out of there. Blood was pounding in my ears but I could still hear them screaming at me…but I didn't look back. I just got out of there and I wasn't sure where to go. I-I thought about going to the police station but…my dad…if he knew…" Johnny's voice tapered off again.

"My dad **can't** know…So, once I saw the Moon Theater, I grabbed my board with one hand and climbed up til I got to the window I always kept open… I-I wasn't sure what to do, just thought I'd hide out here until…" Johnny sighed, "I don't know…it just seemed like the only safe place I could go…and…well, you know the rest."

Ash had so many questions on the tip of her tongue but said nothing.

Heart pounding painfully in her chest as she saw the hopelessness filling his chestnut eyes. Fighting off the rise tears that filled her own, Ash gently brushed the rag ever so gently over his uninjured eye, wiping a tear that had escaped in the process. He gazed up at her for a split second before his eyes wandered back out to nothingness. The silence the only other entity in the room and she accepted it; continuing to run the rag over his face - not even aware of how long they sat there in silence. Both lost in their heads of what was told tonight; questions and concerns both had so cloyingly thick in the room but neither felt in any mood to confront them. So, they stayed silent. Enjoying the rare moment of peace they found themselves in.

It was slow for him at first. Relaxing in the tender ministrations she bestowed on him. The cooling rag soothing the swelling of his cheek as well as the nerves flitting right underneath its surface. All the tension and anxiety right below was calming with her touch. Before he'd realized what was happening, his eyes started slipping closed and breathing slowing down as she continually ran the cool rag over his swollen cheek.

All the while, Ash was doing her best to ignore the smears of blood the rag collected over the minutes. Chestnut eyes really not focused on anything, more looking through her to the ceiling but Ash didn't mind. Still absorbing his story and everything it pertained... How these three animals nearly stole his life away for some damn debt his father had who knows how many years ago? It shook her to her core but as Johnny began relaxing into her touch, she allowed those thoughts to wane.

The silence was comfortable; mellowing…dare she think relaxing? Whatever it was, she appreciated it right now.

A night that had been filled with **so** much anxiety and stress now was more lax even if the situation he had been through kept filtering through her mind. Johnny had been hurt and nothing was solved, nothing was figured out so he wouldn't have to worry about a repeat performance…but he had told her the truth. Johnny had relayed the events of the night and that alone meant more to her than anything.

Ash slipped the rag over his face. Gently cooling down and hopefully alleviating the pain and swelling if only a little bit - she still wanted to badly for him to get more help than she could provide but knew asking it now was completely out of the question...

"...Thank you, Ash…that feels a lot better." Johnny breathed out a moment later and Ash almost choked on another sob that wanted to escape when he finally looked at her. Although his right eye was nearly sealed shut with the swelling and lip split and very painful looking, he did look a little better…

"You're welcome." Ash muttered; running her fingers gently across his cheek in what she hoped was a comforting motion. She continued the ministrations, her own mind buzzing and finding it difficult to relax completely went on for some time.

Staring off into some far off distance when a few moments later, they gravitated back to Johnny's face - and to her surprise and relief - he had fallen asleep…


	7. Solace

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 7**

 **Rated: T**

 **Solace**

 _Chapter Summary: As Johnny sleeps in her arms, Ash reluctantly contemplates what life would have been like had Johnny not survived the violent encounter…_

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 **I can't thank you guys enough for your support! Only one more chapter to go after this! ;-3**

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Ash, upon noticing Johnny falling asleep, was sorely tempted to wake him up by how utterly heavy his shoulders and head felt to her small legs but another part of her never wanted him to move. Knew that right here - right now - he was completely safe from anyone who would dare do him harm.

To even think anyone, and she meant **anyone** who knew Johnny as the sweet soulful guy he is, would willingly hurt him even existed… it was simply incomprehensible.

Ash sighed upon suddenly feeling physically sick; heart beating far too fast and stomach churning with anxiety as she stared upon his slack, sleeping face. The rag she had just been caressing his swollen cheek with now placed forgotten to her side. Icy blue eyes took him in for a long time - her subconscious trailing away to thoughts she dared not entertain. His words and statements about what took place tonight before he arrived flitting around her mind and didn't care to give her much respite.

Johnny being jumped by some old gang rivals of his father for no reason other than relation. Hardly having any time to react before they started beating him without much rhyme or reason - to know how easily Johnny could have died tonight had he not been fast enough, coordinated enough, his skateboard not with him.

So many variables could have changed his fate; the knife that could have slipped _so_ easily between his rib cage - the sharp blade fatally piercing his lung, liver, or vital blood vessels and him bleeding out and crying out in pain as they continued to beat him to death.

Swallowing a sudden lump, Ash felt a few silent tears slip from her eyes; darkening the line of fur on her cheeks. The churn of absolutely agony settled deep in her gut at the very fathoming had he not survived tonight. She dared not even imagine it for the very inkling was far too painful but the thoughts plagued her anyway.

Imagined herself calling his phone but he wouldn't answer (and Johnny, regardless of any circumstances at time of day or night, _**always**_ answered his phone). To worry herself sick about his lack of communication and presence at practice the next morning when he'd always made a habit to never be tardy for anything. Yet, the day would go on and he'd never show up to the theater. Buster would offhandedly mention it with furrowed brows later on and it would only make it all the worse for her.

Even if Johnny was even running five minutes late, he'd call Buster to let him know…

As the day came to an close, she wouldn't be able to concentrate on the music or notes any longer to stave off the anxiety gnawing painfully in her gut. Checking her phone every five seconds to see if he answered her texts to see nothing but a blank screen. Heart fluttering too fast, paws shaking when he still didn't bother to show up.

Ash would have no choice but to leave early and catch a bus to his place with a pit in her stomach; during the ride she'd be calling his phone over and over again - hoping against hope that he'd answer. Yet all she would get is his pre-recorded cheery message of,

"Hi, this is Johnny! Sorry I missed your call but be sure to leave your name and number and I'll call ya back soon! Have a good day!"

The voice that could comfort her in any circumstance only filling her stomach with hot coals of fear because it was a message she never had the chance to hear previously and now it was the only thing she heard. The messages she leaves on that voicemail getting more and more frantic as time went by.

Starting with a more airy,

"Hey, J! Call me back when you get this, kay?"

"Uh, Johnny, um, just kinda wondering where you are. It's been a few hours and wanna make sure you're alive," she'd say with an uneasy chuckle, "Anyway, call me back soon." and finally, skip to a few hours later when her voice easily carried every iota of anxiety she felt.

"Johnathan! Where in the actual **fuck** _are_ you, dammit?! You better call me back the second you get this, ya hear!? If you don't, I swear to GOD, I'll kick your ass!"

…and still, he wouldn't answer, text, or even call her back.

Upon arriving at the garage she'd spent so much time before today, she'd run to the front garage door and pound her tiny fists hard on the metal surface. Waiting on bated breath for him to answer, but still no response. No sounds of his accented voice saying a joyful, if muffled, "Coming!" or "Come in!"…just utter silence greeting her on the other end. No signature footsteps and voice beyond the door; waiting in vain for him to open it and have come explanation for his absence.

Yet none would come.

Who knows how long she'd be there knocking, screaming out threats all in an effort for him to answer. Her anxiety getting worse as she continues to dial his number. Foot tapping and paws shaking as she again listens to his voicemail message and the horrible shake in her system when a robotic woman's voice says his voicemail is now full. Real, actual fear would finally set in at that moment yet she'd swallow it down, grasping onto a reasonable explanation even if there wasn't any left to cling onto…

Ash would probably end up standing there for hours, completely unaware of the police officers and crime scene tape that would be nearby accessing his murder scene just a block away. A coroner's vehicle hauling his body to the morgue without her ever knowing he was gone…

As night comes, she'd have no choice but to leave the garage.

Tempted to go to the prison where his father was incarcerated and hoping against hope that's where he was all this time but the hour was too late for visitors made up its mind for her. Ash wouldn't want to, but she'd be forced to go home; pace around, and just wait for him to call her back. All night as she attempted and failed to find respite in dreams, she'd be wondering where he was - trembling with apprehension and fear as she continues to call his phone in desperation.

Hoping, praying to hear his voice and an explanation of where he'd been - and she even swore she wouldn't yell at him or even be mad…As long as he answered, she'd be relieved…but he wouldn't even as the next day came.

No sleep, no rest, only anxiety fueling her to go to Moon Theater the next morning. Hoping against hope he'd be there. Perhaps his phone was busted and he was just busy…every iota of her heart and soul hoping that's all it was.

Yet, inevitably, she'd find out the horrible truth who knows how long later.

Whether it be some police officer visiting Buster's office to ask about Johnny's history and to tell him the news. Imagining Buster calling them up to his office for a meeting to deliver the horrible news of her best friend's passing. Tears lining Buster's blue eyes when he tells them all that Johnny is deceased…Or something as brutal as seeing a short snippet on the evening news right after the weather report. A few short sentence statement of him being stabbed to death - murdered - in some dank alley. Nothing more, nothing less. Johnny, being the victim of some random gang violence; killed without anyone held responsible…

How easily her life (as well as all those who knew him) would have changed forever…

Ash couldn't help but recall the last meaningless conversation they had earlier in the day. Something stupid and random that didn't have any bearings - a quick mutter of 'see you later' or something about a set they played later in the week. A few exchanged texts that held no value or sentiment she felt toward him or vice versa…nothing meaningful…

 _To think it could have been the last real conversation they ever had…_

Johnny could have been dead now and she wouldn't have known. Still playing her guitar in the hallway not even semi-aware that her best friend was alone - dying, bleeding to death alone in a cold, dank alleyway somewhere without anyone to help him. Lungs filled with blood not being able to speak or call for help before he died cold and alone without anyone but the killers knowing about it until his blood-soaked dead body was found by some passerby the next day.

Ash, on the other hand, would wake up to a bright sunny morning and not even realize anything is amiss until later when he never showed up to work…

 _It absolutely_ _ **killed**_ _her inside…_

Yet this was reality and that thankfully didn't happen.

Breaking out of those overpoweringly haunting thoughts, Ash's hands trembled when she touched his warm furry cheek. Fingers gingerly brushing back the soft fur that covered it; a somewhat smile rising to her face as he flinched at the contact for only a second before leaning his head into her palm. Ash's smile fell as she took in his slack face - fear and anxiety causing her mind to be flooded with visions of seeing him in a casket at his funeral. The cakey make-up not hiding the bruising and beating he'd received in his final moments.

Cold.

 _Stiff_.

 **Dead**.

The very thought broke her heart into fragmented, sharp pieces scattered inside her chest cavity.

A beautiful, promising life cut horrifically short by a jailed father's rivalry - killed only as retribution and payback by some punks who'd never know or even care what a wonderful person they murdered in cold blood. Someone who'd give the shirt off his back, last dollar in his wallet without question, and a constant source of encouragement and positivity to all those who were blessed enough to know him.

They would have killed him…for _**nothing**_ …

Ash didn't want to fathom about what a life without him would have been like….

Best friend, confidant; the sweet guy she could tell anything to and he'd never judge her. Always a constant source of inspiration and an ever-present encouragement that she'd never knew she needed until after she had it. The smile he always wore whenever she'd see him whether it be in the theater for practice or when she'd go over to his place to bum around and eat his food; casually leaning against his side and absorbing his warmth while watching a movie. So many times they fell asleep just like that…

Them, being on the fragile cusp of this strange relationship - teetering on the edge of something far greater but neither were really sure what yet.

Ash's feelings for him were largely ignored over this time; how his beautiful brown eyes had her stomach churning painfully, heart hammering whenever he'd grasp her hand or envelop her in one of his signature spine-bending hugs. How whenever she found himself in his arms that she found herself feeling safer than she'd ever felt before…and that she never wanted to leave. Yet, even if it didn't go anywhere, having him in her life as her best friend was enough even if there would always be that nagging feeling in the back of her mind…

If Johnny had died tonight - there would be a million and one things she would have regretted for the rest of her life.

Regret not thanking him more, spending more time with him outside of the theater, being as encouraging to him as he was to her. Miss seeing his smile every morning and getting those late night texts nearly every evening before they fell asleep. The smell of his cologne and leather jacket sticking in her nostrils when she fell asleep with her head on his bicep. British-accented voice so soothing whenever he spoke or sang. She'd miss every little thing about him and regret more than anything for not telling him that for so long now that she -

Ash swallowed back a lump, mind echoing with things she wanted to say and do - the desperate desire to not leave this theater until every single one of them is taken care of. Her hand lifted; ready to push at his shoulder to wake him up but she stopped herself.

Almost as if removed from a trance, Ash shook her head. Refusing to wake him up from his restful slumber for some half-assed attempt at saying shit she really wasn't prepared to say or even comprehend at this point in time. Telling herself to simply be thankful that he was _here_ and in one piece if a big banged up - warm, breathing, **alive** …

… _and she was_ _ **damned**_ _determined to keep him that way._

So, for right now, Ash just relaxed back into the couch; her taut quills poking at the upholstery for a second before stilling and allowing her to rest against it. A few deep breaths leaving her mouth as she watched Johnny slumber and couldn't help but smile when she knew for sure that he was going to indeed wake up…


	8. Beautiful Disaster

**Beautiful Disaster - Chapter 8**

 **Rated: T**

 **Beautiful Disaster**

 _Chapter Summary: After Johnny's long horrific night and near death-experience, Ash comes up with a plan that may be beneficial to them both…but will he accept her offer?_

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 **Wow! Never did I think this little random plot bunny could warrant so much love! I was tempted to break this up but I think it's gone on long enough so I decided to just finish it all in one shot. Anyway, thank y'all for all of the comments, faves, follows, kudos, etc. that you all have so lovingly bestowed on this fict! I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I enjoyed writing it! Onto the final chapter and hope you stick around for the many Johnny and Ash ficts I have planned for the future! xoxo**

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It was at least an hour before Johnny stirred.

Ash's hands still dragging in soft strokes across his slack face but the second he began stirring, she immediately stopped. Deciding instead to pick up the rag she discarded earlier and pretend she was still just cooling down the swelling even if the rag had already gotten much warmer with the passage of time.

Tired blue eyes met his half-lidded chestnut gaze that peeked out from behind gray (and for his right eye - purplish blue) lids. Johnny blinked a few times as if mentally evaluating where he was before licking his lips with a throaty groan - yeah, not the best idea to lick a swollen, bloody lip.

"...Ash?" he asked, accent heavy and thick with the clinging of sleep.

"Yeah," she reassured with a gentle paw stroke across his brow ridges. "It's me."

"Ugh…" Johnny grunted, arm lifting lazily before he placed a large hand upon his throbbing forehead. "'ow long was I sleepin'?"

"Not long." she answered truthfully, "Maybe an hour or two - couldn't tell ya exactly."

"W-Why didn't you just put my head down? That can't be comfortable for your legs." his genuine care shocked her at times. Here he was broken and bruised in so many parts of his body but yet he found himself worrying about her legs being uncomfortable of all things.

"I didn't want to risk waking you up." she shrugged, voice soft as she ran the damp rag across his eyes to rid him of the bit of crust that formed from his short nap. "If you're anything like me, I get grumpy when I get woken up so I thought it best you do it on your own."

Johnny chuckled, seeming a bit surprised at her gentle and kind action but said nothing other than a breath of "thanks".

"Yeah, well, you would've done the same for me…heh, probably more, but…" Ash's voice tapered off when she saw the pained look on his face; furry brows pinched as he rubbed the tips of his fingers over his forehead.

Ash gingerly brushed them aside and started massaging his forehead with the cooling rag and and purposeful strokes of her fingertips. Relieved when his hands fell back to his sides and he fully relaxed into her ministrations.

It grew silent for a long time as she stewed in the familiar anxiety nestled deep in her chest.

Knowing that while he was alive and in one piece, he was still hurting and that nothing had really been solved regarding his predicament. There was still three deranged animals out there wanting to hurt (kill) him and he refused to call the authorities or even go to a fucking hospital to get bandaged up properly. Terrified to even call the police to report the incident in fear his father would find out and get himself a longer prison sentence when he would indeed break out again and hunt down the bastards who did it. A part of her so tempted to get that to happen (she'd love to watch Big Daddy wring their scrawny necks) but wanting to respect Johnny's wishes won out that baser desire for vengeance.

It was still so damn infuriating though! Johnny refusing help from any outside sources and it was only the adoration she had nestled in her heart for him that she wasn't punching some sense into him right now.

"Well…" she finally spoke when Johnny's headache seemed to wane, "You _really_ got yourself in a predicament, didn't you?" Ash asked (throwing out a million and one other things she wanted to say) while plopping the rag back onto the couch beside her.

"Heh." Johnny chuckled yet no mirth was ingrained in that bitter laugh, "My dad did, but I guess ya can say that…"

Ash bit back a response when he hastily continued; his eyes now open and pleading with her.

"Really, i-it's alright though. I don't want you to worry about _any_ of this, Ash. You have enough on your plate - it's _my_ problem - I'll deal with it."

"Hn - N-Now, how the hell do you propose to do that?" she questioned - quite transparent that she didn't believe he had any of this figured out quite yet. While awaiting an answer, her short fingers moved further up his head to twirl languidly in the longer, lighter fur; taking a second to thumb over the patch of hazelnut tinted fur.

"..."

"Johnny?" Ash asked again.

The gorilla let out a deep sigh before admitting, "I dunno, Ash… I - I _know_ I can't stay here forever. Mr. Moon is already getting suspicious and the guilt is eating away at me, but…I can't stay at the garage either - especially **now**! A-And trying to afford a different place to live while dealing with my dad's lawyers and their outrageous bills that keep piling up, all these unnecessary court dates that cost _so_ much and do so little! Every cent I make is going to this a-and I have no choice but to keep working and hoping for the best but I know this charade can't last forever…I just - I - **GAH**!" he yelled and pulled back her paw when he buried his face in his hands.

A grunt of pain followed the second his palms made contact and Ash wanted to bop him on the shoulder for being an idiot and touching his tender face so roughly.

"Johnny…look at me."

It took a good few moments before he pulled his hands from his face and laid them back on his bare stomach. Ash followed the motion and took in the darkening bruises that now lay scattered on his chest. Visual reminders of the hell he went through tonight - almost losing his life and now having to deal with the consequences of not having a safe, steady home and peering over his shoulder to wonder if they'd attack him again.

That's no life - it's hell, and Johnny didn't deserve that.

Prison was a better word for the situation he was in and Ash wondered if there was even a solution. Her own problems with her ex-boyfriend annoying her all hours of the night were nothing in comparison to the drastic switch Johnny's life had taken. Minor complaints and superficial issues seemed pale in comparison to the circus his life had transformed into. Multiple doubts and questions lingering painfully over what he could possibly do - what she could possibly do to help him…and then it hit her.

Ash's eyes widened as she thought about it and before she could talk herself out of it (or even mull over the idea completely), she found her mouth and tongue doing the work for her.

"Johnny," she spoke steadily, continuing when his eyes met hers, "You're not going back to the garage…and you sure as **hell** not staying here and taking showers in the fucking sink."

"Heh. I haven't gotten _that_ far yet." he chuckled but she sensed the sadness lacing his voice. His face fell a breath later and all the worries he had buried underneath the surface echoed on his down-turned face - it broke her. "What else am I _supposed_ to do? …I have no family that isn't in prison, I'm not even safe at my own house anymore, and I sure as hell don't want anyone else in the theater knowing about this! It's bad enough that _you_ do now…"

Ash's offer died in her throat when that statement fell from his mouth - the rare swear nothing compared to him admitting he never planned on telling her.

"…Wait…y-you never planned on telling me?" Ash's eyes widened and brow heavily furrowed as she peered down at him; not quite believing what she was hearing even as she watched the words fall straight from his lips.

"I - I don't know…Maybe? Ya know, when it was all figured out or over and done with…"

"...or you were dead?"

Johnny was surprised at the tremble in which she spoke, shocked at seeing abrupt tears filling her icy orbs.

"...Yeah…I suppose that's how you would have found out, huh?" he acknowledged, eyes turning away from hers to stare at the ceiling.

The room became almost filled with an almost deafening silence. Only sounds that infiltrated the space were of the whirring lights exuding off the small lamp far off to their right, the muffled echoes of the never-sleeping city outside, and their unsteady breaths.

It came so suddenly - anger so alarming to her as it filled her chest. As if Johnny didn't _care_ what happened to him; not allowing anyone to help - rather deal with it on his own until it sorted itself out or he died in the process. The confession on his lips broke something deep within her.

"How _dare_ you." Ash whimpered.

Johnny's wide gaze suddenly met hers.

"How fucking **DARE** you!" tears began trickling down her face without her consent; causing a thin wet trail to slip down her furry cheeks in their wake. "Not telling anyone what you were dealing with? Facing these maniacs and not even caring if they _killed_ you!? J-Johnny, I - I…h-how….Don't you have **any** idea - o-or know how much you…" her trembling voice tapered off; the pain accompanying the thought of losing him and how little he seemed to care had her voice failing her.

Ash physically couldn't finish whatever statement she had tried so hard to say.

Plain confusion written on his face combined with the hell he'd - they'd been through tonight - had finally become too much for her fragile strength to handle.

No more hesitation present and not being able to handle his warm chestnut eyes looking at her that way, Ash lunged forward. Hurriedly burying her face in his throat; nose nestled against his pulse point followed by a heartbreaking sob leeching out into his fur. Small fingers pulling frantically at his thick black pelt in desperate need to grasp onto something, _anything_ to keep her tethered to this earth and whatever remained of her sanity _._

Forced to confront how close she came to losing him tonight was overwhelming and his blatant disregard for his own life broke whatever remained of her abhorrent grasping she had on a cold, uncaring demeanor. A mask she'd grasped onto for way too long. So simultaneously furious with him but just so relieved he was here in one piece and she still had time…

Johnny more or less stayed completely silent throughout.

Shock slowly wearing off at seeing her breaking down overtook any confusion; desperate need to comfort her simply overwhelming everything else. Large, shaking hands gently enveloped her body. Carefully smoothing down her frayed quills and brushing his palm over her lower back and sides in reassuring strokes. Melting into her touch and warmth bundled against his chest; comfort he'd needed so bad after tonight coming to fruition. It was soon followed by guilt - by hiding such pertinent information from her; not telling his best friend what he was dealing with when he knew she had the right to know.

Johnny had been so used to doing things by himself for so long at this point, he didn't stop and consider how it could effect others - especially her.

"'m sorry, Ash. I shouldn't 'ave said that. I shoulda told ya about all this sooner - I'm _so_ sorry…" Johnny found his voice before it tapered off; accent thick and a bit nasally as he nuzzled her forehead with his furry cheek when words failed him.

Ash couldn't help but smile at the ticklish feeling it bestowed upon her. Hating how she let herself emotionally break down like this but in the same instance never wanted him to stop…just what was wrong with her? Yet her normal brazen and rather prickly side of her personality didn't care for soon enough, she felt herself nuzzling him back. Lifting her nose from the hallow of his throat to nuzzle her cheek against his; body gravitating even closer to his addicting warmth and feel of him under her fur and skin.

Johnny was alive, warm, _whole -_ perhaps a bit battered and bruised but ultimately, he would be okay - and dammit, she was determined to keep him that way.

"J-Just -" Ash whimpered, swallowing back the lump in her throat before uttering, "…just…never fucking do that again - okay? You need to _promise_ me that you'll be more careful and listen to your gut when it tells you something is off - **alright**?"

"...I will," he promised.

"You also better tell me anything that's wrong whether it be you need money for food or you're getting fucking stalked! Stop holding back information because you think it'll bother me or some stupid shit like that! From now on, you better tell me _everything_ \- I **mean** , it Johnny! You're my best friend, you should be able to tell me this stuff!" she muttered into his neck, one hand releasing from his fur to wipe furiously at a few rebellious tears that slipped down her face.

Johnny must have noticed this action and slowly pulled back to look at her; Ash following him as much as she could before she reluctantly opened her teary eyes. Shocked to no end when his massive palm was suddenly cradling her face, thumb tenderly brushing over her cheek to wipe off the few tears she missed in her haste.

"I know, and 'm sorry. B-But, I promise, Ash, I'll be sure to tell ya everything from now on. I swear it." Then he smiled at her; wiping away another droplet that fell and her eyes instinctively slipped away from his. Ash swore he felt the heat rising to her face with the brush of his thumb across her cheekbone…yet found out she kinda didn't care.

"...You better." she whispered before she again buried her face in his throat. She told herself it was only to hide from his penetrating gaze but couldn't help but admit how great it felt (especially after such hell tonight) to hold him close.

* * *

Ash wasn't sure how long they stayed like that.

It was easily the most intimate they'd ever been with each other. Touching and in closer contact than either of them had been comfortable being at any point in time before. Friends that would hug, hold hands occasionally when running through a nasty rainstorm - hell, even cuddle and fall asleep together during a movie -

… _but nothing like this._

Ash supposed it could have easily been the life and death situation or her realizing (and him too) how fragile life really was. A delicate, beautiful, flighty thing that could be stolen and ripped away without rhyme or reason whenever fate deemed fit. Yet, Johnny was spared for whatever explanation and for that - she couldn't be more grateful.

In this moment, she didn't care that her nose was buried in his throat; arms scattered over his broad shoulders as she pressed herself fully against his chest and Johnny didn't seem at all eager for it to stop either. Going as far as holding her in his firm hold without having the barrier of his shirt to keep them apart and him grasping onto his usual modesty. Heartbeats thudding against each other where they could feel the rise and fall of their combined breaths and absorb the warmth of the tight embrace.

It may have been more complicated, but at this time, it was simply contact to let the other know they were alive and for right in this moment, the world was an okay place.

There were no gang members trying to kill him or no annoying ex-boyfriends at her door, no father's locked away in prison, no feeling inadequate and questioning her worth that haunted her on a daily basis. Just two souls enjoying a brief moment of respite from the harsh world that awaited beyond this small couch - nothing more.

 _And that was okay._

* * *

Time slipped by slowly.

Johnny's strong, steady heartbeat was pleasant and comforting beneath her palm; warm breath brushing over her forehead causing the anxiety she had been harboring since seeing him tonight slowly faded away. A quite moment of reflection to which Ash was able to re-think her almost offer she had yet to verbally state.

Only one thing was certain - Johnny returning to the garage was simply **not** happening.

Ash blatantly refused to allow him to go back in the vicinity of those assholes who wanted to hurt him and not even _dare_ to give them a chance to finish the job. Simply wouldn't allow Johnny to live in the theater where there were no showers, places to store food, fridges nor kitchens and thinking of him permanently sleeping on a lumpy couch in some backroom at the theater made her stomach churn uncomfortably.

Throughout it all, she recalled Johnny's reasoning for not having the funds to get a new place. While well-warranted because of his recent struggles (of the barest minimum he told her of anyway): getting his dad out of prison, fierce prosecutors ready to lock him up forever coupled with parole boards, rising court costs and bloodthirsty lawyers (considering her dad was one) who threatened your love one's freedom if they dared miss one paycheck.

Johnny had been working so hard in spite of it all.

Promoting, practicing, cleaning, theater upkeep, and doing everything Moon asked of him and kept up their crazy performance schedule without being a minute late. To acknowledge that every cent he earned was being spent on an expensive lawyer - and knowing Johnny the way she did, he probably refused himself necessities as long as it meant a single chance for his dad to soon be free and come back home.

It couldn't have been easy but Johnny had been trying and kept his positive nature throughout; casual smile never faltering even if his world may have been crumbling underneath his feet at times. Johnny was never one to concern others with any personal issues he may have been harboring - while it was noble, it was quite annoying for she desperately **wanted** to help. This guy had been there for her through it all and truthfully, made it possible for her to start trusting others again. Johnny's permanent positivity (while irksome at times) had her grow to lean on him and now she wanted to repay the favor.

What Johnny truly needed now was a break - respite, relief and not be looking over his shoulder everywhere he went now. Worried they'd attack him or worse - his father subsequently finding out and worried about the lengths he'd go to avenge his son. Johnny didn't need that kind of stress along with his already hectic life and more than anything, Ash just wanted (needed) him to be safe somewhere.

A home away from his worries and those who may want to hurt him… _so what better place than hers?_

Part of her felt insane for considering it but they had spent so much time outside of work anyway it only felt natural. They were always together, calling, texting, and at each other's place to just bum around and it was great. Johnny was clean, respectful, and was nothing but a gentleman - so why would that change in any aspect when living with him? Both worked hellish similar schedules so it's not like they'd be home much anyway and it wasn't as if he'd permanently living on her couch; she had another room she designated her 'music room' but that could be rearranged. Having Johnny alive and in one piece meant more to her than losing out on a bit of her privacy - besides, her apartment felt a bit too empty and lonely most times.

Admitting to herself that having him around would be nice - so before she could talk herself out of it, she let the words form.

"Hey. Johnny?" she asked, breath ruffling his fur as it exited her mouth.

"Hn? Yea?" he muttered and Ash hid the smile when she noticed how sleepy he sounded; maybe even dozed off a bit without her knowledge.

"...You're staying with me and that's final." Ash spoke firmly, daring him to object.

"...W-W - ahem - Eh…What?" accented voice was nothing than a gasp, correcting himself partly through by clearing his throat.

"You heard me." Ash lifted her head to gaze at him. As expected, his eyes were wide and mouth agape while staring at her as if she'd suddenly acquired an additional head.

"...What?"

"Johnny," Ash sighed, "I want you to stay with me - and you're _going_ to stay with me." the strange inkling of the first moment she heard him sing flicked in her head with those words. How something that at once seemed so insignificant at the time felt so profound now. A meaningless lyric once upon a time now felt pressing and breathtakingly significant in its referred meaning as it was used now.

"..."

Ash wondered if he lost the ability to speak; her own voice feeling heavy as her heart pounded painfully against her ribcage and she hoped to God the shaking that developed in her paws and the blood rushing to her cheeks wasn't _too_ obvious. She was about to say something to make the situation and its circumstances seem lighter somehow, but before she could utter anything out, he interjected.

"Ash - I-I," his voice felt foreign; thick and upset in a way she wasn't used to hearing. So much confliction in the expression on his face and his eyes having trouble meeting hers as he spoke. Johnny took a few breaths to gather himself before he continued…and his words were not what she cared to hear.

"...I appreciate the offer - I _really_ do," he gave her a smile that didn't reach his eyes, "…but no. I- I couldn't impose like that - I couldn't do that to you! I -" Johnny froze when she gingerly placed her small fingers over his lips, effectively silencing him.

Ash surprised herself at her forwardness but didn't show it - dutifully ignoring how his warm, soft lips felt under her fingertips and the surprise widening those gentle eyes when she spoke out with all the certainty she felt.

"I _want_ you to stay with me." Ash flushed beside herself at the conviction in her voice and the look in his eyes when she said it had her stomach churning in a way with which she didn't think was possible. How open and clear they seemed and to cover the blush that was becoming much to prominent, she thought a more 'Ash-like' explanation was warranted.

"N-Not only for you but ya see, I have this ex-boyfriend infestation problem and I think you'd make an awesome live-in bodyguard now that I know you're not afraid to throw a punch." Ash chuckled as if to break up the tension she felt lingering in the air. Still her fingers remained over his mouth, tenderly stroking his swollen bottom lip as if to ease it as well as him in the process.

For the first time tonight, she seen him smile (genuinely this time) and Ash savored the sweet sight of it. Something that was always so common on his face was nearly absent tonight until this very moment and it warmed her heart like nothing else had before. A few seconds later, her hand moved from his lip to cup his cheek instead; remaining there to absentmindedly brush the fur covering his cheekbones. It was some form of relief; believing that he'd accept her offer and all the worries that remained buried in her gut would subside.

Yet all too soon, the smile he gave her fell and her heart lodged itself into her throat.

"I appreciate your kindness, Ash - I really do…but…I **can't**."

Ash's own smile faded just as quickly; brows furrowing as she stared at him but before she could butt in with a few choice words of her own, he continued.

"I couldn't do that - those blokes aren't going to give up so easily… I know they aren't, and I care way too much about you to needlessly put you through this. I _can't_ give them the chance hurt you - I-I'd never want that to happen - I'd **die** before I let that happen."

Ash opened her mouth to speak, to stop him saying those things but she froze feeling his fingers suddenly over her lips - effectively silencing her much like she did to him.

"I'm not letting them hurt you too - not because of me, Ash… _Never_ because of me. So, I'm sorry, but… I can't…"

"..."

" _I just can't…_ " he whispered helplessly.

The steel in her eyes and heart was suddenly back with a vengeance.

Johnny's selflessness an annoying pain in her ass she was _not_ dealing with anymore; for in his thinking, he didn't even realize how much his safety meant to her. The fact she needed him, cared for him, and wanted him safe meant more to her than some three deranged jerk-wads finding out where she lived. If it meant Johnny would stay alive and safe, she would deal with whatever hell they bothered to conjure up.

"You think I **give** a fuck?!" she growled after firmly pulling his fingers away from her mouth.

"A-Ash?" he was obviously scandalized by her actions (and words) but she wasn't done.

"I live in a fuckin' apartment - a police officer living three doors down mind you - I highly doubt they'll figure out where you're staying let alone the apartment number. You've been to my place, it's crawling with animals 24/7 - believe me because it's hell trying to fall asleep with all the damn noise! Those criminals may be stupid, but they're not _that_ stupid to try that shit again with all those witnesses around."

"But they might know you live with me, follow you, and even hurt you! Perhaps even try and ransom you to lure me out, and -" Ash placed her finger over his lips again and the way they were pursed had him essentially kissing her fingertips. She ignored the shiver echoing through her spine upon feeling it and instead spoke in spite of it.

"My God! You worry too damn much. Look, I take a crowded walk every morning with a bus full of animals and you usually end up driving me home at night if we're done practicing at nearly the same time…right?"

Johnny hesitated slightly before had no choice and nodded in agreement.

"I'll be _fine_ …and if you stay with me, you'll be too."

Johnny's eyes fell away as if unconvinced.

"Johnny, look at me," Ash directed gently and he reluctantly obeyed, "I _hate_ that you got hurt tonight - I really do. It pisses me the fuck off…but even you have to admit that what happened shouldn't have been a surprise. The guys had been casing the place for at least a week - maybe more - and the garage is in the middle of nowhere! Hardly any street lights on the whole damn property - it's dark as hell at night around there and there's barely any street or foot traffic! It's no wonder that they finally got the balls to make a move!"

Johnny's cheeks darkened in shame but he didn't bother denying it.

"…But if you're living with me, you're not giving them the advantage. There's no way they'd try anything, and if they did, _I'll_ call the police and your dad will be none the wiser…Capiche? We'd go on, those fuckers will either let whatever grudge they have go or be in jail. Everything will go back to normal - only, we'd be roommates. That's all." she finished, hating how her cheeks flushed at the last part.

Slowly, Ash began pulling back her fingers from his mouth.

Semi-expecting him to complain or come up with another scenario in which it was all a horrible idea…but that didn't happen. Instead, the gorilla remained painfully quiet for long drawn out moments; eyes cloudy as if lost in his head and mulling over everything she had told him. Time slipped by so much so that Ash was tempted to continue to further convince him but he beat her to it.

"...are ya sure?" Johnny asked meekly and Ash was tempted to roll her eyes.

"Yes. Would you like it in writing?" Ash teasingly replied.

"Nah, it's alright." he chuckled, smile faltering a bit when it was obvious his swollen lip made it hard to smile for too long. "But I _would_ like to pay you back, at least help with rent at the very least. It'll make me feel better."

"If you insist but _only_ what you can afford, Johnny. Just until this mess with your dad and his greedy lawyers is over then get ready to shell out for half of everything, buddy." The way she made it sound like a permanent thing had both of them breaking eye contact for a moment.

"Heh…I'd be happy to." he chuckled.

"Good. Then it's settled."

"...but -"

"Oh for God's sake, what _**now**_ , Johnny?" Ash groaned, the exhaustion that had been plaguing her for days getting harder to ignore when it finally seemed as if there would be slight reprieve.

"...it's just…all my belongings, how am I supposed to get them out of there? I'm thinking they might stick around there - or maybe not, I don't know…Maybe I -"

"Perhaps go back during the day?" Ash interrupted, "Or bring a few buff friends with you to make sure they stay back? Hell, even Mike has a concealed carry after the whole bear incident and I hear he's a pretty good shot if the assholes want to try anything." she smirked at the shocked look that crossed his face, "You also have a truck - perfect for moving and I bet Meena, Eddie, and Buster wouldn't mind helping you move some of the larger furniture. I would offer my services but I highly doubt I could be of much help." she finished with a gesture to her petite stature.

Those words seemed to have Johnny reconsidering, his eyes flitting to the side before meeting hers again and uttering out yet another excuse, "...even then, Ash, I've been to your place. It's not very large and I don't want to clutter up your place with all my junk - I-It's not right, you shouldn't have to do this for me..."

"We've been over this - I **want** to." Ash sighed heavily, "Johnny, the only place you have to bend down so you don't bump the ceiling with your noggin is my front door - Other than that, it's gorilla sized enough with the tall ceilings and you've sat on and even crashed on my furniture plenty of times and it never broke. As for room, I think we'll manage the space so don't worry about that."

"But -" Johnny opened his mouth to intercept but Ash talked over him.

"But _nothing_ , Johnny! There's plenty of room even if you want to bring your piano over! Besides, the music room you'll be staying in is nearly empty after I threw out all of Lance's shit - I'll just have to move the few guitars and amps into my living room. It's no big deal because I wanted to reorganize the living room anyway now that Lance's music collection is nothing more than a pile of ashes in my apartment's incinerator." Ash shrugged off his fears in her normal laid-back way; even giving a devilish smile when she relived the joys of burning all of Lance's possessions. " _Plenty_ of room." she winked at him.

Johnny cracked a smile and for Ash, it was great seeing the relief fill his face even if a slight bit of worry remained etched into the furrow of his brows.

"Okay," Johnny finally acquiesced and she physically breathed a sigh of relief at his acceptance before he said something she nearly forgot mentioning, "What were ya saying 'bout Lance? An infestation?"

"Oh… That. Well, long story short - he's the bane of my existence and won't leave me alone. It's been going on for awhile."

"...is that why you're here so late?"

Ash hid the flush of embarrassment knowing how Johnny told her of his own squatting ways at the theater. Instead, she just gave him a dry look before rolling her eyes and agreeing with a shrug.

"Guess ya could say that." she verbally admitted.

"He's not trying to hurt you, is he?" the low growl in his voice had Ash looking at Johnny differently. Face heating with seeing very unfamiliar anger crossing those warm chestnut eyes with flecks of reds and coffee browns.

In that moment, Ash couldn't help but recall how upset Johnny had been over Lance since she told him exactly what happened. How his happy demeanor shifted upon mentioning Lance cheating after all their years together; many times he put her down and kept her pushed to the background when singing together. Recalled the slight snarl Johnny spoke with when referring to him since - telling her how she deserved better and how Lance was a 'bloody wanker' for treating her that way. It was the closest she'd ever witnessed Johnny being actually angry…and it was rather flattering that it was over her.

"No." she answered, running a paw over his cheek absentmindedly as if to reassure him, "He's just annoying the hell out of me lately. Texting and calling constantly and since I don't answer my phone, he decided to mosey on over and stand outside my front door all night and irritate the hell out of me. Overall, being a gigantic dip-wad who doesn't take 'no' for an answer; but, another benefit of you moving in is he'll take one look at you and most likely piss himself." Ash chuckled lightly; face heating when she caught herself looking down his muscular chest and broad shoulders.

Johnny's cheeks were tinted red as well but he took it in stride; looking at her as if he wasn't completely convinced of this situation but yet her smile didn't falter.

"Ya want me to rough the ol' wanker up a bit?" he asked jokingly and Ash couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of it all. Here was perhaps the most gentle being on the planet joking about kicking her ex-boyfriend's ass for bothering her, and damn, it kinda sounded amazing even if it was said in a joking manner.

"Hell, if you can make it so he doesn't come over again, I'll be the one paying you to stay over." she teased back, bopping him lightly on the chin and he smiled with all his teeth (even if it couldn't feel good for his lip, he didn't seem to care). Flashing those white canines that had her stomach churning slightly in her nervous gut.

"I'm not making any promises." he brushed his chin against her fingers and she nervously pulled them back to rest on his chest. Wondering to herself how a night that started with such blatant horror and anxiety was now ending with teasing…and perhaps mild flirting caused by their tiredness, Johnny's blood loss, or something entirely genuine - she couldn't tell you exactly. Most of her dared not confront any of that - especially now of all times. Now that he was safe and secure, there was plenty more time to consider all of that later…but not now.

"Dammit," she muttered, smile plastered on her face as she stared down at him; biting her lip and not holding back the small chuckles that escaped.

The moment faded and Johnny, while seemingly convinced of the plan, held a hint of uncertainty in the purse of his lips and distance in his eyes. Ash admitted there was still many hurtles before things would ultimately come together. None of the things they planned would happen overnight or even in a few weeks time if she was at all honest with herself, but she was certain they'd get there in time.

"Ash, I -" Johnny began to speak when she yet again put her small hand over his lips. The surprise was obvious in his face but she just shook her head at him wanting to continue with the thought.

"No more tonight, Johnny." Ash sighed while removing her fingers. Ignoring the baser instincts to keep her distance, leaned down a bit to rest her cheek on his (un-swollen one of course).

Johnny flinched at the contact but didn't object; rather pushed into it, nuzzling her face lightly with his own and she tried not to read too much into it even as her heart pitter-pattered frantically against her ribcage. Ash's cheeks warmed at the intimate contact; surprised at herself how affectionate she was being with him and he with her.

More intimate than friends should be…but she supposed it didn't matter.

"…I'm fucking tired." she said as way of explanation now that she was still laying partially atop of him. As much as she wanted to stay up all night talking to him; it had been a long few days and this was the most comfortable she'd been in a long time.

So, she damn well was going to take full advantage of it.

"Oh…Right…Um, y-ya should get some rest and we can talk more about it tomorrow." Johnny uttered out and she felt her heart skip at the light blush that cascaded over his cheeks at her action. "Mr. Moon won't be here for a few more hours anyway." he continued almost as an afterthought and that made Ash smile into the fur of his neck.

" **We** should rest." Ash corrected.

A part of her told her to get off and lay on the other side of the couch. Even dig up some pillows and blankets to make her a place to rest on the floor - but the warmth and comfort of his body was much too tempting for her exhausted state. So, to both her and Johnny's surprise, Ash didn't pull away completely - merely scooted down his body a bit before fully laying next to him - squishing herself between his side and the back couch cushions.

Quilled head nestled on his broad chest (careful to avoid the bruising), the rest of her petite body curled snugly against his side with her shoulder brushing under his armpit and his arm nestled securely around her. He made no move to avoid her quills and didn't seem at all bothered of how they rested smoothed against his arm. Ash avoided his questioning stare and flushed cheeks as she tried and control the rush of blood infiltrating hers at her forward action.

Yet, she made no move to adjust from her spot and Johnny seemed content with his as well.

Johnny and Ash both lay there for a long time not knowing what to say or do and Ash, surprised at her actions, found she didn't care. Simply closed her eyes and relaxed into his body; strong heartbeat thumping against her ear and knew it definitely was the most beautiful sound she ever heard. Strong, steady, and the rising and falling of his breaths caused her nothing but relief. A night that could have turned into the worst scenario ever ended with her falling asleep on his chest. A night that would be remembered as one where she lost her best friend forever was now one where it would be a shift in which they became closer than ever.

The comfort of it all had her relaxing into a near serene state…

"Ash?" until Johnny's timid voice broke the silence.

"...Yeah?" she asked sleepily.

"I jus'…wanted ta say thanks - for everything," it was merely a whisper; voice heavy with exhaustion but he made sure to say it.

Ash was tempted to lift her head, to tell him it was nothing and she wished she'd done more, but decided against it. Merely scraped the tips of her fingers over his bare chest; warm, thick skin ruffling the fine fur covering her hand. She felt the shiver it caused him and she smiled, nuzzling the side of her head on his chest before feeling it necessary to reply.

"Yeah...no problem," she decided upon - no more really needed to be said (even if a lot went unspoken) but it appeared Johnny was satisfied with it all the same.

"...G'nite, Ash." he said a breath later.

"Night." she replied, eyes never opening but she knew he was smiling when he said it.

Soon enough, his body grew lax, breaths deeper and more even in sleep and she knew she'd be following him into sweet slumber soon.

In those quiet moments between her thoughts and the unconsciousness of upcoming sleep, she thought about tonight's events and those soon to be transpiring after. Sure, not all of their problems would be solved overnight, but what could have been an absolute disaster turned into something else…

A beautiful disaster she supposed because when tonight started, she had dreaded home - the mere idea of confronting the problems at her apartment making her stomach churn. Hating the idea of going there and whatever tomorrow had in store; another night of sleep lost because of Lance's hellbent (and annoying) persistence and the writer's block plaguing her creatively were problems of absolute insignificance when confronted with the very real possibility of Johnny almost losing his life tonight.

Confronting a life without him far worse than anything else so her little problems felt like whispers in a hurricane.

 _Yet, that didn't happen._

Johnny was here - alive, breathing, perhaps battered and bruised, but would be healed soon enough - and sooner still, he'd be living with her. The reality of that still sinking in but instead of nervousness filling her chest - it was excitement. Ash didn't need to dread Lance or fear whatever small inconvenience life held - she needed to simply enjoy this crazy life of hers and dammit, she was going to. As she settled into Johnny's side, she loosely embraced him - his warm skin and fur lulling her to the waiting arms of slumber.

With that final thought and with the soothing sound of Johnny's heartbeat and breath filling her ears, she fell asleep - ready to confront whatever tomorrow has in store for both of them.

* * *

 **Thanks again for all the love! It means more than you know! I am also tempted to do a sequel for this of sorts because I love the idea of Ash and Johnny living together as friends before romance blossoms but I have enough ficts left unfinished...lol. We shall see. ;-p  
**


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